Torment over cash plea by skint lover
HE’S TIED TO HIS EX BY DEBTS
MY lover says if I hand over a large sum of money now, then we can definitely be together in the future.
He insists I need to show my commitment to this relationship by giving him enough cash to split from his current partner.
Basically, he needs “running away money”. He’s currently tied to this woman by debts. They owe cash on credit and store cards and to loan sharks.
Split
He says that if I support him he’ll finally know I am serious and genuine and he can trust me. But is it really my job to pay for his freedom?
Why can’t he simply split from the woman (he swears he no longer loves her) and put his own house in order?
Why do my £6,000 savings even have to come into it?
I’m currently living back home with my parents. My last relationship ended in 2018, so I don’t see that I have to prove anything.
My partner is a very complex, charismatic man. He’s a wicked lover. He’s passionate and exciting and I’ve never had orgasms like the ones he gives me.
When we’re together it’s like we’re in a world of our own. He paints a picture of the magical life we’ll enjoy, filled with pas
sion, excitement and love. I find myself falling under his spell and agreeing to everything.
It’s only when I’m on my own again – in the cold light of day – that I begin to question his logic.
My parents have no idea he sneaks in here when they’re out caring for my house-bound granny. They’d hit the roof.
JANE SAYS: Please don’t betray your parents or values again. This man should not be coming into your home under any circumstances.
I believe he’s trying to fleece you. He can’t stand the fact that you have cash in
a savings account that he could be getting his hands on. You’re quite right – if he’s no longer happy with his long-term partner, then he needs to speak to her about their debts and their relationship. Your cash has got nothing to do with it.
Where did you meet this guy? Did he seduce and flatter you online or is he someone who lives locally?
Just how well do you actually know him because he sounds like a chancer and a shark to me. Start having faith in your own instincts.
Tell him you’re walking
away because this toxic connection is wrong.
Stay strong and be prepared to tell your folks everything because I think they deserve to know that a complete stranger has been flitting in and out of their home.
Prepare for the fact they’re going to be furious, but apologise and assure them this will never happen again.
If you’re not strong enough to face him alone, then get support because I fear he’ll use every trick in the book to keep you hanging on.
You cannot allow him control or overwhelm you. to