URI: I AM WRACKED WITH KILT
Repentant football botherer to use psychic energy to help Scots BEAT England on Friday after he gave 3 Lions victory at Euro 96
Spoon-fiddler Uri Geller has vowed to help Scotland beat England on Friday.
But if you think that’s a bit below the kilt, why not put on our handy tin foil hat to block his brainwaves?
URI Geller will try to help Scotland beat England on Friday to make up for Euro 96 – but we’ve got it covered.
The spoon-bender plans to use his psychic powers to secure victory for the Scots in the massive Euro 2020 showdown at Wembley.
Uri is still wracked with guilt about his actions during Euro 96 when he claimed to have moved the ball with his mind just before Scotland’s Gary Mcallister missed his penalty in the tie between the two nations.
It came seconds before Paul Gascoigne’s iconic goal down the other end on England’s way to a 2-0 win.
But your Daily Star has produced a special “mystical” tin foil hat readers can wear to try to halt the Israeli-brit illusionist’s “energy”.
Uri, 74, hopes to keep Scotland in the tournament after they lost their first game to the Czech Republic.
He said: “England won and it’s now about survival for Scotland. I’ll do everything to help them win. This is going to be only on this match because of what I did in Euro 96.”
Uri will watch the match from his apartment in Israel, where he will hold a Scotland shirt with his name on during crucial moments.
But he admits the mind power of England fans will be a tough test.
He added: “I’ve gone through a lot of tests with the CIA, MI5 and Mossad.
“But England is bigger, better, has more people and more energy.”
Asked what he wants in return for his efforts, Uri said: “When Scotland win I want a special kilt from their manager Steve Clarke.”
YOU would think Uri Geller might learn.
Just 25 years after interfering in one massive football match between fierce rivals, he’s at it once more.
And it’s England vs Scotland again. Only this time, the spoon obsessive has switched sides.
Instead of trying to use his mind to get the Three Lions the win, this time he’s trying to make it up to the Tartan Army by securing a famous victory for Steve Clarke’s side.
And we’re sure the Scottish boss is thrilled.
Especially as Uri’s intervention did appear to move the ball half a millimetre from its spot during that famous Euro 96 tie.
So, ignoring the fact it could just as likely have been moved by a gust of wind or a David Seaman fart, Three Lions fans had better be careful here.
That’s why we’ve produced a special – and not daft at all – tin foil hat for you all to wear to ward off the psychic’s mystical forces during the big game.
We bet he didn’t see that coming!
BUMPTIOUS:
describing presumptuously, obtusely and often noisily and irritatingly self-assertive individuals
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Amjad Rehman was caught by trading standards officers selling a 25kg pack of flour – normally priced £12.49 – for £22 at his Food World shop in Birmingham.
Rehman, 56, of Edgbaston, and his company were fined £480 by Birmingham magistrates after pleading guilty to misleading commercial practice.
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