Fella’s lies to bag cash from family
SNEAK’S DEBTS THREAT
MY on/off boyfriend has been “borrowing” money from everyone I know.
People keep complaining about his increasingly farfetched sob stories.
He told my brother he needed cash for a life-changing operation and my aunt that a “mere” £2,000 would pay for corrective eye surgery for his poorly grandmother. But he’s not ill and his grandmothers both died in 2020.
Begging
My guy has become a massive liability. He’s sneaky and devious, and will do anything for free cash.
At the moment I’ve got my parents moaning that he keeps turning up at their back door for food, drink and, yes, more cash. My clever sister has had an intercom fitted and won’t let him in.
A few months ago, he humiliated me at my cousin’s wedding. People were drinking a lot and he virtually went round with a begging bowl targeting my most kind/vulnerable relatives.
Eventually my cousin hissed at me to do something and I had to drag him out by his ear. He simply considered the wedding a good hunting ground and thought he’d been very clever.
I estimate he must owe £20,000 to a dozen different people – and now he’s saying it’s all my problem. He and I have a complicated relationship. He can be funny and sexy and irresistible.
One day we’re loved-up and happy, the next we’re tearing each other apart. We make up and break up all the time.
At the moment I’m finally trying to get him out of my life.
But he threatens that if I walk away, then his debts will be on my shoulders – that it will be up to me to compensate my nearest and dearest because he’ll be a hundred miles away.
How is that fair? I no longer have any respect for him but feel as though he’s holding me to ransom.
I don’t have a spare £200, let alone £20,000 and he knows it.
JANE SAYS: The fact is your on/off guy is never going to pay anyone back – whether you’re in a relationship with him or not.
So you may as well cut your losses and end this toxic relationship right now.
Sadly, he’s proved himself utterly ruthless and selfish. He has no scruples and will say anything in order to con decent, generous people.
His behaviour is quite shameful but are you going to change him? No. Are you going to be able to convince him to do the decent thing? Again, no, because he doesn’t think like you. He has no conscience.
Do any of your circle believe a crime has been committed? Did he ever threaten them? Was the money a loan or a gift? In short, do the police need to know?
I understand that you have a passionate and slightly addictive relationship, but I’m convinced your life will be a whole lot better without him in it. He might be a lot of things, but he’s not decent, trustworthy, or good enough.