My Christmas hell with a gobby diva
IN-LAW’S JUST SO SELFISH
MY sister-in-law is such a diva. Everything is a massive drama with her.
From going on fabulous holidays to redecorating her massive house (yet again), she loves to complain how stressed out and busy she is.
Apparently, I have no idea how difficult it is packing for a Caribbean cruise. Picking the wrong paint colour for her new kitchen would be social suicide.
What gets me is that she has no idea how hard we have it. She never takes the trouble to ask.
Limit
She assumes that my husband (her brother) and I have pots of disposable income, but we’re struggling to survive.
My husband’s mother is insisting we stay at her house for Christmas this year, but I don’t think I’ll be able to hold my tongue if my selfish sister-in-law starts bragging again.
My husband says I should ignore her, but how can I when she pushes her good fortune down my throat every time we meet?
I’m not a naturally jealous or envious person, but everyone has their limit.
I know plenty of other people who are just as wealthy and lucky as she is, but her insensitivity is off the scale. It’s almost as if she gets a buzz out of kicking us because we’re down.
My husband used to have a good job, but his firm went bust last year and now he relies on old mates to give him shifts.
I work on commission and earn a fraction of my pre-pandemic wage packet. She doesn’t work and hasn’t done for years, but her boring husband seems to go from strength to strength.
It’s hard to keep my gob shut when she’s so self-centred.
JANE SAYS: No-one would blame you for feeling apprehensive and angry.
Your insensitive sister-inlaw sounds like a Class A turkey. Either she’s tone deaf or very cruel.
Why is it that she can’t empathise with you? What makes her so special?
If your husband is determined to spend Christmas at his mother’s house this year, agree some rules right now.
For starters, don’t stay too long. Rock up for the day itself and leave at teatime.
And vow to keep yourself busy with cooking and washing up and stay out of her way. Avoid a bust-up at all costs, because no-one needs that on Christmas Day. Then plan your next year (and Christmas) so you spend as little time in your sister-inlaw’s company as possible.
When the time is right, you can arrange to have a private chat with her and make it clear you’re not impressed.
She sounds bored and very insecure to me.
If she only has holiday packing and paint colours to worry about, then it could be that she lives a very lonely and shallow life.
Make sure you’re getting all the benefits you’re entitled to and don’t allow her to get to you.