Mates plotted to ditch me from hol
IT’S NOT ABOUT MONEY
MY pals have booked a holiday that I’ve not been invited on.
I’ve just discovered that six of them are flying to Ibiza in a few weeks.
They’re staying in a trendy hotel and plan to drink, dance and “mess around”.
I’m furious. What about me? All I’ve been told is that I won’t “fit in”.
They don’t like the fact that I’m in a relationship and they’re all single. They know that my guy and I are on a budget and saving up for the deposit on a flat.
Rot
Apparently they want to be free to let their hair down and spend, spend, spend. They don’t want me judging or holding them back.
But that’s absolute rot. I have savings. Plus, I’m perfectly capable of looking after myself and have never been a hanger on or a nuisance in my life.
What really gets me is all the lying and the secrecy. Just before Christmas I started asking if anyone fancied going away this summer. I couldn’t get a straight answer out of anyone.
Now I realise that they’ve been plotting and planning behind my back.
What’s even more humiliating
is that I only found out the truth via my boyfriend. He heard rumours down the pub and asked me why I wasn’t flying out to the sun too.
I thought these women were my genuine friends. We all met in school at 11 years of age. We’ve been through so much together. The woman I’ve always considered my closest friend is embarrassed and avoiding my calls.
Her pregnant sister (who isn’t even going) is the only one willing to give me any answers and I feel like a social outcast.
JANE SAYS: I agree that your friends are being underhand and childish. It’s mean of them to leave you out without any explanation.
I suggest you call a meeting so you can talk this over.
Let it be known how upset you are. Remind them of all the things you’ve been through over the years.
But you must also be prepared to hear some home truths. Maybe there are other reasons, besides your boyfriend, why you haven’t been invited on this trip.
Can you think of anything you may have done to upset them? Has money/splitting bills been a problem in the past? Sadly, if no one is prepared to meet you halfway, then you’ll have to weigh up where the friendship group goes from here.
I get you’re upset and feel insulted but if they simply don’t want you around then you need to make your own plans for this summer. They can do whatever they want.
It’s their money, time and choice. Perhaps this is a natural parting of the ways.
Turn to your boyfriend and concentrate on building a new life with him – and the other people in your life who really care.