Derby Telegraph

Beware the New Year’s Resolution

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With January traditiona­lly being seen as one of the busiest months for matrimonia­l lawyers, (indeed the first working Monday of the New Year is traditiona­lly nicknamed ‘Divorce Day’) with legal firms up and down the country reporting record numbers of enquiries, it is, perhaps, important that we look at the reasons for this as a note of caution.

However, the new enquiry in January is, perhaps, not surprising when you consider that the New Year is traditiona­lly seen as a time for a new start with people making various “New Year resolution­s”. Maybe a “resolution” to sort out a separation and have a fresh start. The reality is that the great majority of resolution­s fall by the wayside over the next few months.

It is not surprising that couples find the festive period a difficult one. The run up to Christmas, which is ever more drawn out in the popular press, is stressful and emotional. We are bombarded on our TV screens with images of perfect couples, loving families, all immaculate­ly dressed with perfect smiles and chinking champagne glasses, giving expensive presents.

This image, however, is not the reality of the situation for the vast majority of people. The vast majority of people spend Christmas perhaps cooped up with children running around, falling out, with bickering in laws, having to serve up meals which meet people’s expectatio­ns of Christmas feasts. Add in copious amounts of alcohol and it is not difficult to imagine tensions will arise. The media also portrays Christmas as a romantic time – it is a popular time for proposals – and yet, for the majority of people, Christmas is a time when fractures in relationsh­ips show, simply because the vast majority of relationsh­ips do not conform to the romantic ideals that we are bombarded with in the popular media on TV, etc. and the pressures that are put on families over the festive period.

Therefore, a note of caution should be used before instigatin­g divorce proceeding­s in January. Yes, it can be a time to think about relationsh­ips, how they can be improved, but perhaps we all need to be honest about the fact that Christmas is hard and it is normal for there to be some disharmony. The way that you feel about each other in early January may not be an accurate reflection of your relationsh­ip during the rest of the year which is why there should just be a note of caution before leaping into a ‘New Year – New Me - New Divorce’, but rather taking a period of time to reflect on matters.

Ruth is a Partner at our Derby office in the Family department specialisi­ng in the financial aspects of marriage/ relationsh­ip breakdown. Contact Ruth by email ruth.jones@ smithpartn­ership.co.uk.

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