Should I be stockpiling?
Brexit panic buying could reach fever pitch this month, but not in this corner of Norfolk
In case you haven’t heard, as it has hardly been mentioned in the news, this is a rather significant month in the whole Brexit debacle. B-Day is looming.
It seems unlikely at the time of writing that a solution will ever be found – but one thing is certain, should there be some sort of insane Brexit Armageddon come March 29, leaving shop shelves bare and Britain on the brink of social collapse, one group won’t be worrying one jot.
They may be scorned by some, but the stockpilers can smugly gaze at their bulging larders and garages full of emergency supplies, while others fight over the scraps. Apparently, we should all be stockpiling – and looking in my own kitchen cupboards yesterday, to be greeted by a paltry jar of pesto, a tin of cherry pie filling from Pancake Day last year and herbs and spices of varying ages, we are going to struggle should all food and drink suddenly disappear from the shelves overnight.
Living in a house with two continually hungry growing boys I can hardly stockpile enough food to last two days, let alone two months.
There have been some excellent examples of emergency hoarding in recent weeks. Take one gentlemen who has taught himself to hunt squirrels, I assume just in case he has to go without his usual steak. He has also stockpiled tents, sleeping bags, tarps and winter clothing. I may be wrong, but if we crash out of Europe, I’m pretty sure that our houses won’t be instantly demolished. I concede perhaps there might be a shortage of baked beans and toilet roll, but for now, I will assume bricks and mortar won’t face immediate destruction.
Then there was a lady who was stockpiling food with a long shelf-life just in case. It almost sounded sensible, until she added some ‘nice vinegars’ to the list. Imagine the horror – you head to a certain high end supermarket on March 29 to discover that not one single bottle of posh vinegar remains. How will we go on? Perhaps that should have been a slogan for Remainers during the referendum: Leave Europe and face a chip shop vinegar future.
People are stockpiling all sorts; you name it, some people are hoovering it all up – I suspect the same people who strip the shelves of bread and milk like a swarm of locusts after the mere mention of the word snow in case of a shortage – ironically causing said shortage.
It’s hard to take it seriously and I refuse to give in to panic – that would require too much planning. Besides, there is plenty of great food and drink being made locally which won’t be stuck in a lorry in some sort of no man’s land either side of the English Channel. Booja Booja chocolates, local gins, Mrs Temple’s cheeses and freshly picked samphire and asparagus – hang on a minute, suddenly a week or so of Brexitgeddon doesn’t sound that bad.
And if not, there’s always a packet of dried lentils and pearl barley circa 1989 somewhere at the back of the cupboard. We could flavour them with the nettles which my husband cultivates, allegedly for the wildlife, at the end of our garden. Who needs fancy vinegar and fillet of squirrel when you can have lentil-a-la-weed every day?
N‘Living in a house with two continually hungry growing boys I can hardly stockpile enough food to last two days, let alone two months’
ABOVE:Are you stockpiling the essentials?