‘FOR MY FIRST WEEK ON THE WAGON, I WAS A NOT-SO-HOTMESS: RED FACED, SPOTS SPROUTING, MY NOSE SHINY WITH DETOXING GUNK’
and Kim Kardashian, it can take our skin up to a month to get over a single hangover – bad news as the party season lurches into gear. ‘When you have a hormonal jolt caused by a sugar fest – let’s say, a pizza party – there’s salt, dairy, carbohydrates and alcohol,’ he explains. ‘It will take about 30 days for that to calm down.’
‘Celebrities don’t have chefs to control their weight – they have them to control their skin. When they’re on active filming, there is zero alcohol. Does this mean you can’t periodically have a glass of red wine? No. It means you can’t have three glasses.’ Meanwhile, he says of the traditional post-hangover fry-up: ‘You might as well paint blemishes on your face.’ Small wonder that those with serious skin goals choose to renounce booze.
Personally, after a lifetime of resplendent carousing, I stopped drinking two years ago because I couldn’t sleep. Then, I realised I had an alcohol problem. However, the only thing other people noticed was the effect on my skin. Despite drinking ‘only’ the half-bottle-anight that many women consider normal – more, obviously, when I was on a roll – the impact was seismic.
For my first week on the wagon, I was a not-so-hotmess: red faced, spots sprouting, my nose shiny with detoxing gunk. I got conjunctivitis, my tongue was permanently furred and my eyelashes fell out. However, compliments about my skin started pouring in after seven days.
By day 10, I was happy to answer the door sans slap. Two weeks in, my cheekbones looked supermodel sharp. Three days later, a man at a party mistook me for 19 (19!) years younger. After a month I glowed, my face had lost its booze bloat, and even my nails were stronger. I also ditched the stone-and-a-half I had put on in six weeks after a spectacularly boozy summer.
At this point, I happened to run into Dr Prager, who took one look at me and declared: ‘My God, Betts, you’ve stopped drinking!’ Renouncing the mother’s ruin was the best thing I have ever done for my appearance. Other than hopping into a time machine and preventing a lifetime of sun exposure, nothing is ever going to have the same impact. No serum, no facial, no superfood. (Sorry.)
Going on the wagon may be standard in La-La Land.