PINT OF MILK
Frozen 2’s Kristen Bell on her dairy habits. Next month: Adele Dazeem.
Which character were you in your first school play?
I played a banana in the first act and a tree in the second. My tree was fine, just sort of part of the crowd, but the banana was where I really got to show what I could do.
What one thing do you do better than anyone else you know?
Pack. Like a motherfucker. I’m Mary Poppins. I anticipate my family’s needs, so I know what they might want two days from now, even if they don’t. And I was great at Tetris as a child. There is no wasted space. I might be the world’s best packer.
How much is a pint of milk?
I’m going to say $5.49. That’s really expensive? Good. I want the cows to be treated well and honoured for their service. I want them, like, living in a house, and I am prepared to pay for that.
Which movie have you seen the most?
It’s a five-way tie between: Aladdin, The Little Mermaid, Indiana Jones And The Last Crusade, Cry Baby and Waiting For Guffman. Those are indicative of my entire emotional life from childhood to college age.
Have you ever had a nickname?
Okay, buckle up. When I was four, I was an unbelievably stubborn child. One day I decided Kristen was not cutting it and I needed a new name. I told my parents they had to start calling me Smurfette. It was Smurfette or nothing. For about two weeks I wouldn’t answer to anything else. Eventually, they sat me down and said, “We cannot call you Smurfette. If you want a nickname, we can do that, but let’s choose something else.” I was, of course, furious, but I said, “Fine. Call me Matthew.” That was my cousin’s name. “No, that won’t work either”. We agreed on Annie, which is my middle name. Up until I was 16, all my family and friends called me Annie. My family still do.
What’s the strangest place you’ve ever thrown up?
When you’re 19, you can drink in Canada.
I grew up by the Detroit-windsor border [an area that covers the US and Canada], so my strangest place was aged 19 in a minivan coming back from Windsor, Canada. I threw up and my best friend Bob caught it in his hands. I’m so lucky to have him.
When were you last naked outdoors?
I am the opposite of a never-nude. I have no concept of whether I’m wearing clothes or not. There is an outside area between our bedroom and the laundry room, so I will often go outside nude to grab something. It’s accepted in my friendship circle that sometimes you will see me nude. I will change in front of you because it doesn’t occur to me not to.
Growing up, whose poster was on your wall?
The first time I showed my husband my childhood bedroom he saw a big poster of Antonio Banderas. He said, “You love Antonio Banderas? You never said.” I said, “Yeah, I guess he’s fine.” “But you have his poster?” I shrugged and he said, “You went through puberty very late, didn’t you? Did you put this poster up because other girls did and you thought you should?” He was 100 per cent right! It had never occurred to me. I wanted to fit in and I just put up the first poster I saw. He thought it was charming and the funniest thing in the world, and that’s all I care about.
What is the worst smell in the world?
Seal poop. Smelled it in concentration while whale watching. Gagged so hard I thought my eyes were going to fall out.
What’s your earliest memory?
I have no memories. I don’t remember yesterday. Seriously, every day is a clean slate. I look at photo albums of my life and it’s all brand-new information. Maybe it’s because I’m used to memorising roles. I mean, I remember I was a banana. OLLY RICHARDS