RISHI’S DISHES IN A NUTSHELL

Well well, what’s on the menu?

A teetering plate of discounted deliciousness in an IRL restaurant, courtesy of the Chancellor’s Eat Out to Help Out scheme.

Quite the mouthful. I’d like a reader’s digest to go, please.

Oui, chef. The Government is forking out a load of dough to subsidise struggling restaurants and coax a Covid-wary public back into dining out just before the whole industry — and the 1.8 million people who work in it — heads off a cliff.

How noble. What does that mean for me, though?

It means diners can enjoy 50 per cent off their meals, with the discount capped at £10 per head. So if you eat out with four pals, you’ll get £40 off the bill.

Every day?

Slow down, big spender. It’s only in play on Monday through to Wednesday in August, which might just capsize your weekend plans in favour of encouraging a BNO on a Tuesday.

OK. And this is at every restaurant?

Um, no. But at a lot of them; (73,000, to be precise), from fast-food favourites to Michelinstarred big-hitters. Burger King, McDonald’s, Wagamama and Wetherspoons are au fait, as is a £20 steak deal at any of Hawksmoor’s 10 sites.

Helpfully, you can plug in a postcode on the Eat Out to

Help Out website to get a run down of discounted locales.

OK, so both reading small print and doing minor maths is required here. Fun.

Yes, but let’s break this down. You and a friend want to grab a Monday lunch together. Instead of spending £6 on a Boots meal deal, you could spend £7 on a £14 burger, with the Government footing the remainder of the bill.

What’s been the upshot?

A surge in footfall has made business owners a little happier.

How’s Rishi feeling about getting the bill?

Pretty happy. He’s slapped an Eat Out to Help Out sticker on the window of 11 Downing Street, and launched an Instagram face filter game to go with his signature policy.

A what?!

You know the face filter drill; you stare into the phone camera as a randomly generated name (in this case a restaurant that wants to play ball) is projected on to your forehead. Sigh. Cheque please.