My children make me hoarse – but can also stop me in my tracks

WE all know kids can say the funniest things.

There have been TV shows and money dedicated to the humour of wee ones.

They don’t have all the answers – but they have oh so many questions about their world.

They are not impressed by big houses, swanky holidays or designer clothes.

But – for my boys in any case – worms found wriggling in the mud are fascinating, and these same worms, they seem to think, would be happier in our kitchen. I’m hoarse with screaming. The other day, I switched on the telly and there I was – weirdly doing a starfish move lying on the floor of a property on Homes Under The Hammer.

“You know who that is Chester?” I said to my three-year-old.

“Yes, it’s you, Mummy” (with a look of have you forgotten who you are?). He followed rapidly with: “Can I have a Kit Kat?”

My boys don’t care that their mum has reached her target dress size or career goal.

They only like that my tummy is soft to cuddle into and that I have a ready supply of snacks in the cupboard.

But sometimes they’ll also say the most poignant of things.

And these moments can stop you in your tracks and make you want to

weep for the innocence of their little minds.

Like this week when my four-year-old Monty struck up a conversation in the car.

Monty: “So you married Daddy a long time ago?” Me: “Yes, even before you were here.” Monty: “What do you mean, ‘before I was here’?”

Me: “Well, you’ve only been on the planet for four, nearly five, years. “I’ve been on this planet for 41 years.” Monty (a frown, a pause, a head cocked to the side): “So how long will I be on this earth mummy?”

Tears sprang to my eyes at the sheer honesty of his question. How to explain? “For a long, long time,” I told him, wiping away my tear.

I looked in the mirror at my smudged mascara and suddenly didn’t mind the dark circles under my eyes that come as part of the parenting job.

And I loved my son even more for reminding me of the beauty and preciousness of life.