HEY YOU –YES YOU, OVERTHINKING OVER THERE…

And just in case you’re not sure if I am talking to you, here are a few questions just to check:

I love to be super organised and know exactly what needs to be done.

I like to oversee how things get done, even when I have said I trust someone else to do them. I play out every scenario in my mind before committing to anything new.

I plan conversations for every eventuality when entering a new social space.

I replay every conversation when things haven’t entirely gone to plan.

I am always exhausted by the time stuff is done.

If you answered yes to one or more of these, thenyes, I AM TALKING TOYOU!

You see, we have been conditioned as women to have it all figured out, to have every eventuality covered, and always to keep everything “right.” We are also conditioned not to show how we feel, which creates stress, anxiety, and depression.

But listen up - you have every right to change the script, unlearn the old ways, and relearn how you want to live in your lane. Here are three of the most common techniques I use with clients to help them banish the overthink:

STEP ONE - THE POSITIVE REFRAME

When you find yourself in a negative spiral of thoughts, try this:

Catch the thought while it is in motion.

Think about the words you’re using to describe the thing you’re thinking about. (i.e., problem, worst ever)

Choose new words to describe the thing you’re talking about (i.e., challenge, opportunity) Re-tell yourself the story using the new language.

Capture the new ending and try your best to go with it.

Don’t beat yourself up if it doesn’t work every time; just keep trying.

STEP TWO - CREATE SPACE BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR THOUGHTS

If you’re an overthinker, you’re likely a rapid action taker too – try this to create space between the thought and the action, which in essence, will start the unlearning process and create energy to relearn.

Catch the thought while it is in motion.

Write the thought down.

Walk away for a few minutes, or if you don’t have time for that, take three big deep breaths. Ask yourself how you would like the scenario to play out by simply saying,“what’s the best that can happen.”

Take the more positive thought into action. Reward your positive intention.

STEP THREE - PRACTICE REAL GRATITUDE

This is truly one of my favourite practices that will always bring me out of my head and into my heart, making it easier to disconnect from thinking into love and emotion.

Each morning and night, find at least three people/things that you are grateful for.

Write down who/what they are and what makes you truly appreciate them.

Revisit the lists when unhelpful thoughts take over to reconnect you to everything that is great in your world – then revisit step one or two!