SLACKER VISHNU MATTERS OF FAITH
God incarnate warned over poor work attendance, divine tax dodger busted, naked End-Timers and new Marian miracles
An Indian man has repeatedly refused to go to work as he says he is no longer a mere mortal. Rameshchandra Fefar was appointed superintending engineer with the Sardar Sarovar dam project on the Narmadar river near Navagam in Gujarat in September 2017. He told his boss he was God incarnate after being questioned over his poor workplace attendance, having only worked 16 days in the last eight months. “I am Lord Vishnu’s 10th incarnation as Kalki,” he said. “I am doing penance at home by entering into the fifth dimension to change the global conscience. This work I cannot do in the office. Thus I don’t remain physically present in the office.” He claimed that the intense meditation he performed at home had been instrumental in ending India’s recent droughts. “Even if you don’t believe I am indeed the tenth incarnation of Lord Vishnu I will prove it in coming days,” Fefar told reporters. “I realised that I am Kalki avatar when I was in my office in March 2010. Since then, I am having divine powers. Just like everybody laughed at me at the time of Mahabharata, you guys are doing the same because you’re unable to see God in me”. dailymail.co.uk, 21 May 2018.
DIVINE DEBTOR
A cash-strapped Melbourne restaurateur has claimed he is divine to avoid an £85,000 tax bill. Kim Huit Tang argued in the Supreme Court that he was “a living spirit in the greater universe continuum” over whom the court had no jurisdiction. In a 15-page affidavit described by Judge Peter Gardiner as “rambling and nonsensical”, Tang claimed he was not himself but a “living breathing soul force” and “a spirit of House Tang”. To quote: “We are who we are, not, who the imagination, devices or records of me, say that we are.” Well, quite. He was being sued by creditors after failed restaurant Rice Bar Not Only Rice, which he no longer owned, racked up £70,747 in debts. His company has been in liquidation since May 2016. The judge ordered Tang to pay all outstanding debts as well as the plaintiff’s legal costs. (Queensland) Courier-Mail, 14 May 2018.
READY FOR THE END
Michael and Shannon Ouellette were arrested on 14 May after they were seen naked walking away from their house in Southmayd, Texas, that had just caught fire. “It was definitely a breaking point for them,” said Joshua Meek, their nextdoor neighbour. He said he had known the couple and their 13-year-old daughter for four years. Their kids would often play together. “They were very good people, very warm people, helpful people,” he said. But recently, he said, they were getting rid of all their stuff and acting oddly. “They went and sold every one of their personal belongings. They went to the park and literally were handing out $100 bills.” Meek said he thinks they were getting ready for The End. “I think they were ready for a new start,” he said. “They believed today was Judgement Day.” The couple were arrested for attacking a police chief and an officer, evading arrest and endangering their child. The daughter was flown to a hospital in Plano. KXII News (Texas), 16 May 2018.
MIRACLE AT LOURDES
The case of a French nun who recovered from a decades-old back problem that prevented her from walking normally has been recognised as the 70th miracle at France’s shrine of Lourdes. The appropriately named Sister Bernadette Moriau from Beauvais, northern France, visited the holy spring in the foothills of the Pyrenees in July 2008, then aged 69. She had spent 40 years in a wheelchair and relied on morphine to fight chronic nerve pain. She said: “I felt a well-being throughout my body, a relaxation, warmth. I heard a voice saying ‘Remove the apparatus’. In an act of faith I took it off. And when I took away the brace and splints my foot was straight and I could move without any pain.” Her chronic sciatica had disappeared for the first time since her condition was diagnosed at the age of 27. Nicolas Brouwet, Bishop of Lourdes, announced the miracle at Mass on 11 February. Five million supplicants visit the shrine every year. Over 7,000 miracle recoveries have been claimed, but only 70 are recognised by the Church. The first was in 1858 when pregnant Catherine Latapie, 38, fell from a tree and paralysed two fingers while breaking her fall to save the baby. After dipping her hand in a stream at Lourdes, she was able to move her fingers again. D.Telegraph, 12 Feb; D.Mirror, 13 Feb; Sunday People, 18 Feb 2018.
OUR LADY’S TEARS
A Virgin Mary statue at Our Lady of Guadalupe church in Hobbs, New Mexico, is apparently crying tears that smell of roses. Father Jose ‘Pepe’ Segura was told about the tears on 20 May and he saw people wipe the bronze statue’s face only to have the tears reappear. “That’s when I saw that she really was crying,”’ said Father Pepe. “I think it’s a reminder for all of us to get closer to God and to stop being violent.” On 24 May, church officials arrived to test the tears and help rule out mundane explanations. They also X-rayed the statue and investigated its provenance. “The process could take years,” we are told. In any case, parishioners are convinced that they witnessed a miracle. dailymail.co.uk, 27 May 2018.