SIDELINES...

BRINGING GOOD CHAIR

University of New Mexico student Conrad Duran and his girlfriend Andrea thought a pair of old dining chairs they had left outside their home had been stolen on Christmas Eve – until they found them returned a few days later, with a fresh coat of paint and new upholstery. Duran found an anonymous note on one of the chairs about doing good for others. “Now they just look absolutely beautiful,” he said. [UPI] 30 Dec 2020.

WAKE UP CALL

A car driver has been given a warning by police after repeatedly disturbing residents in the Brockhurst and Elson areas of Gosport. The man and his passengers repeatedly shouted “Wakey, wakey!” in the early hours of the morning. Hampshire Police said they had received “many complaints” about the driver of a red Nissan Navara, who was also seen turning off his lights and shouting “You can’t call the police because you can’t see us!” BBC News, 14 Nov 2020.

FONDANT FANCIES

An Egyptian woman was detained after she was accused of baking “indecent” cakes. The tasty treats, topped with fondant icing in the shape of genitalia and underwear, were consumed at an exclusive Cairo sports club hosting a birthday party. The baker was arrested and later released on £234 bail. Dar al-Ifta, a government religious body, warned that such baked goods were forbidden by Islam. BBC News, 19 Jan 2021.

“IT’S ALL COMING BACK TO ME NOW”

A Céline Dion fan legally changed his name to hers while watching a TV concert of the 52-year-old legend on Christmas Eve while drinking a magnum of champagne. Céline Dion, 30, née Thomas Dodd, explained how he paid $122 (£89) for the online registration, then forgot all about it. Some days later he received an envelope containing the official documentation. “Initially, I had to sit down as I couldn’t believe it,” Mr Dion said. However, “once it sunk in, I signed it straightaway as I bloody love her!” nypost.com, 1 Jan 2021.