SIDELINES...

LONG SHOT

Helene Zlotnick visited a small business in Cornwall to sell advertising space. While chatting to the proprietor, a friend of his dropped by. It transpired that the friend came from Cheltenham, like Ms Zlotnick. “You weren’t, by any chance, born in the Sunnyside nursing home?” she asked in zest. Yes, he was – and on the same day as her, 4 July 1941. Eve. Standard, 23 Jan 1984.

URBAN NIGHTMARE

Leonard Shoulders, 33, was waiting for a bus in the Bronx, New York, on 24 October 2020 when the pavement collapsed and he dropped almost 15ft (4.6m) into a sinkhole teeming with rats. He broke his arm and leg and dared not yell in case rats entered his mouth. It took half an hour to rescue him. D.Telegraph, 31 Oct 2020.

NAME GAMES

A cat belonging to Georgia Careless in Wells, Somerset, has been nicking clothing from neighbours. Meanwhile, Johanna Tooth, 37, from Cornwall, won £5,000 compensation for botched dental treatment. Metro, 27 Nov; D.Mirror, 22 Aug 2020.

SPACE POLITICS

Last December, the Jerusalem Post reported, with a commendably straight face, a claim by retired Israeli general Haim Eshed that US military leaders had been in touch with a Galactic Federation of space aliens. At the bottom of the article, the Post noted that it was “unable to reach out to this supposed Galactic Federation for comment.” Private Eye #1537,

18 Dec 2020.