A REAL TURNIP FOR THE BOOKS...
AFTER LANDING IN HOT WATER WITH THE TAX MAN, CUTE ROOT VEG CHARACTER IS BACK TO TRY HIS HAND AT ROBBING BANKS
Turnip Boy Robs a Bank
(PEGI 7) Xbox X/S, Xbox One,
Switch, PC
HHHII
ONE of my favourite indie games of the last few years was Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion.
Released in 2021 it was funny, quirky, surprisingly thoughtful in places and, at just under three hours long, had a campaign which didn’t outstay its welcome.
Now the game’s adorable little root veg protagonist – who has learned he has mafioso blood in him – has evolved from tearing up tax bills to bank robbery.
Unlike the first game, which saw you wandering around Veggiville trying to placate the aggrieved Mayor Onion, this game has you robbing the Botanical Bank on a loop.
The aim is to get as much cash as possible on each short run before the building’s alarm is triggered and the police arrive.
While that sounds simple, it’s really not.
The bank itself is filled with eccentric characters – and heavily armed security – who will slow your progress by giving you tasks to carry out as you rampage through.
If you make it out alive, you return to the safety of the Pickle Gang’s lair, where you can upgrade your weapons, access the dark web to buy items that will get you deeper inside the bank, and hit the gym’s vending machine to boost your health, your skills and your wardrobe.
Die before you escape, and your loot is halved and you return redfaced.
Each run starts in the ‘lackluster lobby’, Turnip Boy’s van careering through the wall.
You’ll literally shake down unlucky customers to get cash from their pockets and proceed through the doors.
While the main body of the bank remains constant, entering lifts which are dotted around the map will randomly deposit you into one of a handful of predetermined rooms.
Some are packed with lasers which you’ll have to disarm in order to reach the vault at the end, while others are full of safes for you to hack into.
The key is to be on your way back to the van before the timer runs out and the police arrive, otherwise it’s a shootout, as hordes of heavily armed veg arrive.
Initially you have a small handgun which work great on the earlier runs.
On your travels through the bank you’ll find random weapons – a fish, a cactus, a cherry bomb – which you can pick up and take back to the ‘Twins’ at the Pickle Gang safehouse.
Handing them in means even better weapons can be developed, which you’re going to need as you progress further and further into the bank.
Weapons will also be dropped by security and police, like shotguns and rifles with scopes on them.
These too go back to the Twins, and soon you have quite a powerful little arsenal at your disposal.
The earlier runs are all about making as much cash as you can, so you can quickly level up your equipment. You’ll need to buy C4 explosives to access the vaults, and a laser pointer to cut your way into the safes. You can buy time extensions, so it takes longer for the bank’s alarm to sound, and boosters that mean you can fire your guns faster.
You will also need to have your wits about you as there are four bosses lurking inside the Botanical waiting for a fight.
Oddly, I found the first boss, Sergeant Yeehaw, the toughest to take down, while the final boss, the terrifying Uncle Rigsby, was surprisingly easy to defeat.
Robs a Bank is by no means perfect, and I found myself dipping out after an hour or so because I was feeling a bit Groundhog’s Day with the action. But when I came back to it, that feeling had gone and I was ready to push further into the bank and steal some real money.
Developer Snoozy Kazoo has put a lot of love and care into this game, and it shows. I can’t wait to see what adorable capers Turnip Boy gets up to next time.
Buy it: £13.49 on Switch at nintendo.co.uk, £12.79 on Steam at store.steampowered.com, and £12.49 on Xbox at xbox.com
The bank itself is filled with eccentric characters – and heavily armed security – who will slow your progress