Tell me how an­noyed mummy is

Gloucestershire Echo - - FAMILY MATTERS -

“Do you want mummy to change your nappy?” I might say, hop­ing for an an­swer in the af­fir­ma­tive, thereby giv­ing me cause to say, “Emma wants you to change her”.

There’s also the spo­ken anx­i­eties method of com­mu­ni­ca­tion.

Vic­to­ria might say, in a gen­tle voice, to one of the twins, while I’m sit­ting in the same room: “Mummy’s worried the stair­gate still doesn’t fit prop­erly.”

So, now I know Vic­to­ria is con­cerned and it’s up to me to ease those con­cerns, but it’s all too easy for me to say, in a gen­tle voice again, to Thomas, “If Mummy’s so very worried about the stair­gate then she might have to look at it her­self be­cause daddy has ex­hausted the lim­its of his ex­per­tise.” From here, this con­ver­sa­tion is only ever go­ing to es­ca­late into some­thing more forth­right. The only prob­lem with this form of com­mu­ni­ca­tion is the fu­ture. If the twins pick it up, every­one in the house will be speak­ing softly and in­di­rectly telling me what to do for the rest of our ex­is­tence.

Kids seem un­aware of their role as in­di­rect mes­sen­gers

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