They weren’t kidding when they said having
DOUBLE TROUBLE FOR A FIRST-TIME DAD OF TWINS
“THOMAS is definitely excited,” Victoria said.
“Really, how does he know it’s his birthday tomorrow?” I offered in a suspicious tone.
“I’ve been telling him for the past few weeks,” Victoria said with a serious expression.
This didn’t convince me either of the twins were aware they were about to turn two.
Nor would they understand how my life had gone from selfishness to selflessness. This existence was all they’d ever known, but I can still recall those halcyon days, when I only had to worry about myself going to the toilet.
It’s in the dim past but just in case the twins are ever curious, here are just of a few of the ways in which life has changed: ■ Lunch is not really a meal anymore but a collection of things the twins don’t want. ■ These ‘meals’ are mostly eaten standing by the fridge or while picking food off the floor.
■ Going out for dinner in a restaurant is still possible, as long as you’re done in less than 20 minutes, take toys and don’t expect to eat.
■ My house is no longer my castle but more a large, very full storage box.
■ The cleanliness threshold has fallen to the extent there’s been some dried yoghurt on the dining room wall I don’t think will ever be dealt with.
■ A desire to make it through the next couple of years is
And relax: Work is now a nice break from it all