‘Cooking for my family helped me through the darkest times’
Becky Fanthorpe, 37, from Essex, used food to nurture herself back to her old self again after divorce. Now, she is sharing her cheap, nutritious recipes on social media.
As a personal trainer and nutrition adviser, food plays a big role in my life. I love experimenting with different ingredients and flavours and creating something special that makes me feel good.
I first got into cooking as a young mum. I was 21 when my son, Matthew, was born and, four years later, I had his sister, Lily. As they grew up, I enjoyed making family meals and ensuring they had healthy lunch boxes to take to school.
But when my husband and I divorced in 2018, after 15 years together, the routine I’d built over the years suddenly crumbled. The change in dynamic made me lose my way a little, and it felt difficult to readjust. I lost the good feeling that came with cooking meals, such as a big Shepherd’s Pie, for my family. Soon, I found myself preparing quick meals for the kids, but nothing for myself. Instead, I was living off snacks, toast and supermarket sandwiches.
TIME FOR CHANGE
Not fuelling myself properly meant I was at my lowest. I felt sluggish and unhealthy, especially as I wasn’t exercising. I remember looking at myself in the mirror one morning and thinking I looked so pasty. I didn’t recognise myself, and that’s when I decided I needed to do something about it.
For months, I hadn’t had the heart to do a supermarket shop, but I knew this needed to be the first step to changing my ways. Money was tight, so I had to be creative in how to find cheap, healthy family meals, and how I could make them last. Cooking for my children helped me feel like myself again. I would cook with music on, and the creativity of experimenting with different ingredients, especially Asian flavours, such as soy, garlic and honey, helped bring my appetite back.
In May 2022, I decided to share the meals I was creating on social media. I felt that if cooking could help me, it could help so many other people, too, and now I’ve built a small community of people on Instagram and Facebook, who send me pictures of all the nutritious and colourful meals they’ve prepared. It’s such a great feeling to know that I’ve inspired so many people, and that they’re proud of what they’ve created.
I’m so grateful that food got me through the darkest of times and helped me get my zest for life back. I’ve also found love again. Steven and I had been friends all our lives, having gone to the same school, and after my divorce our friendship turned into something more. We had a baby, Tommy, last January and are getting married next year.
If someone told me I’d have two teenage children, a 16-year-old and a 12-year-old, and a baby, I wouldn’t have believed it. You think your life is set out, but actually, it never is and you can achieve whatever you want.
My recipe for life is Vegetable Curry. I hate wasting food, especially when money is tight, so I love putting all my leftover vegetables into a big pan with chopped tomatoes and onions, which I slow cook with herbs and spices. I serve it with a big bowl of rice, or it’s delicious on its own with a sprinkle of coriander and almonds.
@beckyfanthorpehealthwellness
Life is never set out and you can achieve whatever you want