‘I HAVEN’T HAD A BUM LIFT OR BOTOX’
The candid star talks X Factor, Scherzy’s real age and surgery with Jordan Paramor
It’s 14 years since The X Factor exploded onto our screens, and Louis Walsh made the leap from band manager for the likes of Boyzone, Westlife and Girls Aloud, to opinionated, chuck ling judge. Joining the original line-up alongside Simon Cowell and Sharon Osbourne (back when the panel was only a threesome) – and aside from a break in 2015 – the Peter Pan of TV is The X Factor’s longest-serving judge. The good news is he isn’t ready to hang up his sharp suits and even sharper comments just yet. The 65 year old is having too much fun, and says this year’s panel is his dream line-up.
While that’s, you know, lovely, what we really want to hear about are the rows, the novelty acts, and whether or not Louis’ had Botox yet. Sorry, it’s just the way we are…
Are you excited about The X Factor coming back? Yes, this is a great, great series. I’m not just saying that. I’m telling you the truth. The talent is better this year in every category. The panel is the best, too – by a mile – because we all get on well and we’re all very different. So, are you, Sharon, Nicole and Simon the dream team? Absolutely. Everybody has an opinion and we’re all honest. We say what we mean, not what people want us to say. Has there been any bickering? Yes, there always is, but we don’t get upset
‘Donald Trump is the greatest wannabe in the whole world’
about it. We’re like a very dysfunctional family and we forget about things very quickly. You’re officially the longestserving judge. Are you proud? I am. I’m also the longest-serving judge on TV, apart from Judge Judy. I love it, because the show genuinely changes people’s lives. Have you and the panel had any good nights out recently? We all went out and Sharon, Nicole and I were the last ones there. We were asked to leave at 3am. We hate going home when we’re having a good time. We always have a great gossip. Oooh, got any juicy stories for us? We talk about everybody, but I can’t tell you. No way. I have to learn to keep my mouth shut. I must. What did you think when Simon revealed that Sharon and Nicole are being paid more than you? [Shrugs and smiles.] They probably are because they need more make-up, more hair, more styling and more security. I just show up, jump out of the car and I’m ready in five minutes. They need at least three hours in make-up! Did it make things awkward during filming when you found out? Never! We’re actually not like that. We just laugh about stuff like that. We can slag each other off all we want – we don’t care. What’s Simon’s dressing room like this year? There are always a lot of mirrors, because he likes looking at himself. I mean, if I looked like him, I wouldn’t want to look at myself. You know, the odd hair, the silly flares… Why would you want to see all that? Nothing’s changed, either. He’s still got the same look, like someone out of The Dave Clark Five [a ’60s band]. Do you think you’ve found the new One Direction or Little Mix this series? I do think there’s a potential Little Mix there. What’s the worst act that auditioned this time? For me, it’s always the nice girl who sings a nice song in nice clothes. You’ve got to stand out from the crowd, whether it’s visually, or vocally, or personality wise. You have to have ambition. Nicole still has so much ambition inside her and I love it. She is the best female judge I’ve ever worked with. Hang on – what will Sharon say about that? Sharon will understand. We both wanted Nicole back. We’re her number-one fans. She brings something different and she can sing, and Sharon and I can’t sing. She’s hilarious, talented and gorgeous. She ticks every box. She may be out really late the night before filming, but she’s still on it. How the hell does Nicole always look so good when she clearly loves to party? She’s done all of this from a very early age, and she’s done it all herself. She knows how to make the best of herself with make-up, hair and clothes. It’s great that she can still do all of it at her age. Please put that in. Nobody knows what age she is, but she’s older than she says she is. [Giggles.] Go on, put that in. Isn’t she going to totally bollock you if we do? I don’t care! That shows how well we get on. I can say things like that. Dermot reckons you’re the new Mr Nasty, since Simon’s become a dad. Would you say that’s true? I don’t think so – I’m just me. I just say things and I forget I’m on TV. [Laughs.] I’m not going to bullshit people. They see through all that. Do you ever get sick of the novelty acts? They’ve kind of gone. We have had a lot of drag queens, though. Some might say I’m working with three. [Laughs.] We’ve got a brilliant guy who’s got a long ponytail, and he’s unusual. But he’s not a novelty act. We’ve heard that the Six-chair Challenge is really brutal this year… It is, but that’s the way the business is. We have to fill the chairs, but if somebody better comes along, you have to pick them instead. Let’s clear up one of our favourite rumours. Have you had a Brazilian bum lift? Not at all. Sinitta and Simon said it as a joke. Would I ever do it? No, it would be disgusting. Several years back, you said you’d never had Botox – but are you embracing it now? I haven’t done any Botox ever, ever,
ever – and I probably won’t. I got my eyes done ages ago, but never Botox. I don’t need anything else done. I’m looking fab. If anything, I’m getting younger looking. All I’m doing is eating less junk food. Simon said about you: “Deep down, he’d probably like to be the next Kardashian.” Is that true? No way! But I find them more
entertaining than the Trumps. I just don’t get the orange Trumps. I don’t even want to see Donald or hear his voice – he brings me out in a rash. He’s only interested in one thing, and that’s himself. He’s the greatest wannabe in the world. So, President Trump won’t be joining the X Factor panel anytime soon, then? No. I just don’t get it. The hair, the silly red face… [Shakes his head and laughs.] Have you spoken to Mel B at all? She’s having a pretty rough time of it lately… I sent her a text. I love her. If Nicole wasn’t on the panel, I would like Mel. Some days she’d arrive in a onesie looking really rough, but give her an hour or two in make-up and she’s a diva. I always have a laugh with her and she’s a great mother. Her three kids are so well mannered. I said to her once, “I thought they’d be like you, a little bit crazy.” But they’re just gorgeous. Mel is a real survivor.
The X Factor returns on Saturday 2 and Sunday 3 September at 8pm on ITV