Cultivating a social life rather more ordinary

Apparently a third of people lie about what they do at the weekend to make them seem more interesting.

One in 10 even post fake pictures to their social media profiles in an effort to back up their tall tales.

This all seems a bit messy, with those eager to impress tangling themselves up good and proper in a web of lies and heavily filtered Instagram snaps. But then, that’s what social media is isn’t it? It’s just a personal PR machine in which users try and outdo each other in an effort to present the most fantastical version of themselves only for others to fire abuse at them for doing so. It’s all great fun. That’s why, I presume, my brilliant Attenborough-esque video of my attempts to shepherd a large, winged insect out of my house only got eight likes.

My Twitter account boasts admittedly inconsistent banter and day-to-day observation about things like, oh I don’t know, a meal deal selection, and yet it’s been haemorrhaging followers. This is real life people! I’m quite happy to embrace exactly how boring I can be at the weekend and during the week too.

In fact I deliberately downgrading my evening antics to seem somehow more respectful.

But maybe all of that is the problem, has my honesty or rather apathy made me into a poisoned brand? You may have heard of influencers, well maybe I’m a dissuader?

A niche market, yes, but maybe just as valuable.

Maybe people just don’t care about a local journalist trying a really good craft ale or fascination with Kanye West.