PHILEVANS­col­umn Why are we so ea­ger to take of­fence to­day? It’s warmth over com­fort any day for me

Llanelli Star - - Letters - You can fol­low Phil Evans on Twit­ter @phil­e­van­swales or visit www.phil­e­vans.co.uk

I’M out­raged.

I’m burst­ing to bring the world’s at­ten­tion to an im­por­tant is­sue that re­ally an­noys me.

I’ll be con­tact­ing all the TV and ra­dio sta­tions, de­mand­ing I’m al­lowed - with­out be­ing con­fronted by any coun­ter­ar­gu­ment - to air my valid grievance.

I in­tend to do this . . . as soon as I find some­thing that re­ally an­noys me.

Well, ev­ery­one else is do­ing it, so why not me?

Reg­u­larly, while watch­ing break­fast TV, the milk on my corn­flakes quickly be­comes soured by the sight of some dead­beat I’ve never heard of, speak­ing on be­half of their half-baked or­gan­i­sa­tion or “Think Tank” (I’ve only just learned to “Think Bike!”, let alone Think Tank!) that dis­ap­proves of some­thing that 99% of us have never con­sid­ered to be a prob­lem.

They loudly point out that we 99% of the pop­u­la­tion are ter­ri­ble peo­ple be­cause some­thing that gets their goat doesn’t get ours.

Mine, in­ci­den­tally, is hap­pily roam­ing free in a field just out­side Am­man­ford.

Although their pon­tif­i­cat­ing should make my blood boil, my usual re­ac­tion is to won­der where their fund­ing comes from, shrug my shoul­ders and put some fresh milk on my corn­flakes.

Sains­bury’s cus­tomer mag­a­zine re­cently in­cluded a Per­sian recipe to in­tro­duce flavours to their cus­tomers that they may not have en­joyed be­fore.

The in­gre­di­ents also in­cluded some In­dian items.

In­clu­siv­ity and di­ver­sity in one meal, you might think. Not so.

One an­gry British Ira­nian wrote to the boss of Sains­bury’s, de­mand­ing an apol­ogy be­cause treat­ing Ira­nian and In­dian in­gre­di­ents as vir­tu­ally in­dis­tin­guish­able was “Ca­sual, lazy racism, and ab­hor­rent”. Now, I’ve dis­cov­ered that the dic­tio­nary def­i­ni­tion of the word “ab­hor­rent” hap­pens to I DON’T know about you, but over the past cou­ple of days I’ve had some trou­ble warm­ing up.

At this rate I will be dig­ging out the ther­mal un­der­wear gar­ments which have been hid­den away up un­til now fol­low­ing last win­ter’s hol­i­day.

On Satur­day evening, I couldn’t help but no­tice that the ma­jor­ity of the pun­ters fre­quent­ing Wind Street in Swansea were wear­ing next to noth­ing. be . . . “In­spir­ing dis­gust and loathing”. While there are many

Yes – bare legs and flimsy tops, and cer­tainly no fur coats.

And the women were just as bad! Don’t get me wrong, ex­tremely fash­ion con­scious, but zero prac­ti­cal­ity.

It’s now dawned on me that I’m at an age where com­fort and prac­ti­cal­ity takes prece­dent over fash­ion.

Bor­ing to some, I know, but I’d rather be warm and happy than cold and mis­er­able.

Please don’t say that I’m alone on this? ap­palling things go­ing on in this world that de­serve to be de­scribed as ab­hor­rent, I hon­estly don’t think a recipe con­tain­ing a few in­cor­rect in­gre­di­ents re­ally de­serves that de­scrip­tion.

I’m just a co­me­dian, but I think the world would be a much calmer place if, in­stead of ap­pear­ing so ea­ger to take of­fence, more peo­ple just shrugged their shoul­ders and poured fresh milk on their corn­flakes.

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