BUILD A FULLER PICTURE OF YOURSELF
WHETHER it’s going for a new job, taking on a new challenge or the smaller, day-to-day stuff, at some point, everyone has heard that little voice in their head say they aren’t good enough.
For many people, though, that feeling is more frequent, and they’re plagued by a lack of self-belief and questioning.
“It’s very common to see ourselves in black and white terms – so we are either successful or a failure,” says psychiatrist and CEO of Thrive mental wellbeing platform, Dr
Andres Fonseca. It may be common, but that doesn’t make it right – or realistic, he says.
So, how can we push that niggling voice aside and have a bit more faith in ourselves? saying, ‘I’m useless at this’, or ‘That was just a fluke’.”
Wendy Smith, a personal development mentor, TEDX speaker and Paralympian, agrees: “We are programmed throughout our early years with those subtle comments that get stored at a deep level. These rerun throughout our adult lives, causing havoc and continual unsupportive thoughts, leading to that nagging little voice of doubt, which is always there when you don’t need it.” Understand the power of self-doubt
Wendy explains: “The brain does not distinguish between imagined responses and real responses, therefore when you say you can’t, or you doubt yourself, it believes the imagery and emotions and makes it a reality. The human system is so powerful that it will support and bring to fruition anything you are currently running through your mind.”
These beliefs can be really limiting, leading to missed opportunities and diverse life experiences, she says.
REMEMBER there are many, many ways to view yourself – we are “multi-dimensional beings”, Dr Fonseca says. You are not simply your job title, or your family role, you are an infinite number of things, which have infinite value. “We need to know that we have many qualities, and achieve a sense of feeling that these qualities are valuable in different ways. The next job is to actually believe ourselves when we say these are valuable qualities that we should take into account when appreciating our own self-worth,” he says.