i can’t fight anorexia any more – i have tried so very hard but it has won me...
‘I CAN’T fight anorexia any more. I have tried so very hard, but it has won me’ – the devastating last words Pippa McManus wrote before stepping in front of a train.
Pip had been fighting anorexia for three years before taking her final, fateful last steps at Gatley railway station in December 2015.
Her battle with the illness started at the age of 12 when she started as a pupil at nearby Kingsway School.
Mum Marie McManus had told the inquest Pip started to become ‘obsessed’ with looking at her side profile in the mirror and at her chin, asking if it was fat.
She became obsessed with her diet and started exercising compulsively. She joined running and boxing clubs and would survive on very little food.
It was around Christmas 2012 when things began ‘spiralling out of control’ and the family sought medical advice.
She was treated by Stockport Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services and Galaxy House at the Royal Manchester Children’s Hospital.
A doctor described Pip’s case as ‘probably the most severe’ case of anorexia nervosa she has seen. At one point she weighed just 27kg.
At the age of 13, Pip was detained under the Mental Health Act and later admitted to the Priory Hospital to receive treatment for her crippling illness.
During one visit home, the teenager wrote ‘goodbye’ notes to her family, her doctors and even her beloved dog.
They read: “I do want to grow up and have a life, at the moment I don’t have one. I can’t fight anorexia any more. I have tried so very hard, but it has won me.”
After finding these notes, Pip’s overnight visits home were stopped for six months before they started again in August 2015. She was due for release in November 2015 but this was delayed when it was discovered she had bound her feet in tape for two weeks, believing they were fat.
Hidden inside a cuddly toy in her room, staff also found a pencil sharpener blade.
Pip had been at the psychiatric hospital for more than a year. And despite concerns from her parents that her treatment had stalled, she was released under a community treatment order on December 4, 2015. Just five days later she argued with her parents about her excessive gym use.
In an emotional outburst she yelled ‘I am going to kill myself now’ before running from the family home on Frances Avenue, Gatley. She travelled to Gatley station and stepped in front of a train.
In the wake of her tragic death her parents set up The Pip Foundation for ABC Anorexia & Bulimia Care.
All money donated will be used to help other people struggling with eating disorders.
In a JustGiving site to support the Foundation, her mother wrote: “I do not want Pip’s life and suffering to have been in vain. Whenever she was able, she tried to help others suffering from similar conditions and I am hoping to continue her good work through the Pip Foundation.
“I sincerely hope that you will donate to my chosen charity ABC in aid of those suffering from anorexia and bulimia.
“With your support, Pip will never be forgotten, her memory will live on, and her foundation will continue to help the people she tried to help while she was still alive.”