HE PUT ME THROUGH HELLHeavens
WOMAN BRAVELY TELLS OF HOW SHE RECORDED CONTROLLING BOYFRIEND’S ABUSE
A WOMAN who lived in terror at the hands of her controlling fiance secretly recorded his abuse as evidence of her torment in case she died.
Stacey Booth bravely reported her boyfriend of seven years Alexander Heavens, 24, to police.
Earlier this week, a court heard he bit her on the arm and punched her in the face numerous times.
Stacey, a funeral arranger, said she feared her co-workers and family would end up sorting her burial.
She said she became so convinced she would end up dead that she started making secret recordings of Heavens’ activity and sending them to herself to let her family know what had happened.
The court heard that as the couple lay on Stacey’s bed, Heavens, from Oldham, placed her thumb on her iPhone’s home button to unlock it with her print.
He checked her messages before waking her up to interrogate her throughout the night as to who everyone was, prosecutors said.
On one occasion, Heavens bent Stacey’s fingers back until she thought they’d break, the court heard.
Heavens pleaded guilty to engaging in controlling and coercive behaviour in an intimate relationship at Manchester Crown Court on Monday. A judge deferred sentencing until May.
Stacey, 24, said she felt numb and ‘ran on nothing,’ dramatically losing weight and waiting for birdsong at the end of each night to let her know she could escape to go to work. Speaking out about her ordeal, she said she hopes her story will inspire others to get out of controlling relationships. Stacey said: “You think it’s going to be your happy ever after story. You get engaged and think you’re going to get married, but then reality set in and it just got worse and worse.
“I had a voice at the beginning. But the more he did to me the more my voice just went away.
“I used to record him towards the end because I felt like no one would believe me.
“That’s what helped me get him into the courtroom. I used to put my phone face down and as he drifted off to sleep I’d put my camera on because I knew he’d start.
“My phone would record the whole night. I would wake up and he would be trying to get on my phone.
“He would check through all my social media, all my work friends who I work with. He used to check through everything.
“The last year, I felt like someone I worked with would [end up] working on my body. It just felt like a matter of time.
“I felt like one day I wouldn’t be here to tell anyone what had happened to me. I was just grinning and bearing it and trying to get on with it. It was hard.
“I was absolutely terrified. I was numb. At work nothing would affect me because I constantly felt numb throughout it all.
“I felt like it wasn’t real. I was so tired, so exhausted and I was just getting through each day - although I don’t know how. I was running on nothing. I wasn’t eating.
“[Making those recordings] was like a survival instinct. I thought if one day they go on my laptop, they will see what he did to me.
“I was hiding evidence on my laptop in case anything ever came of it and I wasn’t here to tell the story.
“I kind of came to terms with it because I just knew it was a matter of time. I never saw an escape or thought I’d be able to get through it.
“I just thought ‘this is my life now’ for the rest of my life, however long it lasts.”
It was Stacey’s first relationship. She said she was ‘young and in love,’ so she put up with Heavens’ behaviour.
After the pair got engaged on Stacey’s 21st birthday in 2015, she says Heavens began taking cocaine and his behaviour changed.
His drug taking was referred to in court.
Stacey found the strength to flee her home shortly before her 23rd
I was absolutely terrified. I was numb... I never saw an escape Stacey Booth
birthday in October 2017. She packed a bag and moved into her mum’s house while Heavens was at work.
“For months after I left him, I used to cry every time I heard the birds tweeting because it would remind me of that sense that I’ve got through another night,” Stacey added.
“He used to put me through absolute hell.”
Despite not being with him for more than a year, Stacey claims she still feels that he has some control over her mind – although she is slowly learning to find happiness again.
Stacey said: “In the end I moved up to my mum’s when he went to work. I got all my stuff together.
“Obviously my family have supported me, and I’ve stayed with my mum ever since.
“You can’t live a normal life even though I’m out of it. I would be scared to leave the house just in case.
“In over a year while I’ve not been with him I’ve gained three stone and I’m a lot happier.
“That was just living in a box room at my mum’s house with nothing. I took nothing with me. I’ve never been back to the room where it happened.
“He was that controlling that, even a year and more on, he still has control over me. He still crosses my mind every time I make a decision.
“That’s how much he’s affected me. He was just so controlling over everything.
“The last year I’ve realised how much he’s pulled my family apart. I just look at my mum and think she’s aged five years in one year knowing what’s happened to me.
“I didn’t deserve to be treated like that.
“I am definitely feeling positive about the future now. Now the dust has settled and there’s an outcome, I want to help others.
“I want to start my own safe place just to say to other people there is an escape because you literally cannot see an escape when you’re going through it.”
In court, defence lawyer Stuart Duke, mitigating said: “The defendant accepts he is guilty of controlling behaviour. This was his first long-term relationship. He accepts he behaved badly.
“He was drinking a lot after the break-up, he took it badly, and he was taking cocaine.”