I hope to save someone by speaking out
WOMAN WHO SUFFERED ABUSE IS NOW FACE OF PHOTO CAMPAIGN
“I HATE the word victim. And I don’t even like the word survivor. I’m not a mere survivor – I’m an agent of change.”
Amira Taha speaks calmly but fiercely, with the energy and poise of a woman who has not only come through great pain, but through it has found an understanding of herself far beyond her past. She is gentle, and emphasises kindness, but equally quietly steely.
And these are all qualities that you can see in her portrait, taken by celebrated photographer Allie Crewe, as part of her project ‘I Am,’ which shines a light on those who have experienced Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) in their lifetimes.
Amira is an accomplished professional, working both as a welfare rights officer at Salford council and as an International Development Consultant.
She was born and raised in Egypt, but left to do her graduate studies in the UK, worked internationally, and returned once again to Britain, where she has lived ever since.
She has also experienced IPV through emotional and mental abuse at the hands of a previous partner.
Amira’s portrait is one of the dozen from the project that is being publicly displayed in Metrolink stations across Greater Manchester this month – something she is understandably nervous about.
“It’s a weird thing. There’s a mixture of emotions. You’re embarrassed to show that it happened to you,” she admitted. “You’re embarrassed because compared to other abuses, it’s nothing.”
As a ‘private’ person, even many of Amira’s friends are not familiar with her experiences with IPV. So when a friend texted her last week asking if the photo displayed on a Metrolink station was her, she initially felt a mixture of embarrassment and empowerment.
“I’ve had to try and put a certain state of mind in my head,” she said, explaining how she came to terms with sharing her story so publicly. “To see that I am strong enough. I am human enough. And, also, that I have enough humility.
“So I replied yes, it is mine. I am fighting abuse.”
Amira and Allie met while the photographer was shooting a separate project, focused on racism, a couple of years ago. They stayed in touch, and Amira felt able to share personal stories of her trauma with her.
Then about a year ago, Allie contacted her and asked if she wanted to be part of the ‘I Am’ project.
After initially being reluctant to take part, Amira agreed.
It was then Amira became conscious that she was putting down her own experience – seeing it as ‘only’ emotional abuse and manipulation, which she struggled to validate in the same way as physical abuse.
“It was only emotional abuse, just gaslighting, negative criticism, guilt tripping, financial abuse. Even when the truth was shining, I doubted myself. I thought I was going crazy. But emotional abuse can kill. Don’t second guess yourself if you see the signs.
“The emotional abuse I was under made me learn to emotionally abuse myself. I reached a point where I thought about taking my own life.”
Amira found the strength to leave the ‘toxic’ relationship, and began to work through her trauma in therapy.
She now hopes that by not only speaking about her story, but displaying her face in such a captivating way, other people may be encouraged to recognise emotional abuse in their own relationships.
“I think people have to know that you might save someone’s life by speaking out,” she said.