YO U ’ V E HAD A MARE!

Benjamin Mendy is just as awesome off the pitch as he is on it. With a combined 3.5 million followers online, he regularly posts updates about his Shark Team and all their crazy adventures. Legend! Mendy becomes so obsessed with his phone, he sneaks it on the pitch and live vlogs during games – allowing oppo attackers to rinse City!

LIVERPOOL OO

There’s never been a more energetic Prem boss than Jurgen Klopp. Touchline tantrums and ferocious fist punches prove how dedicated he is – The Reds have not been this close to a Prem title in years! Klopp’s animated antics go a step too far and he self-combusts. He’s blown to pieces – along with Liverpool's title dreams! In a team lacking creativity creativity, bald midfield maestro Aaron Mooy is crucial to keeping The Te r r i e r s i n t h e P re m i e r Le a g u e a ga i n t h i s s e a s o n ! Mooy starts to grow hair and miraculously loses all his powers as Huddersfield’s key creator!

Let’s face it – Tottenham would be nowhere here without Harry Kane’s strike rate. The England captain is on course for another 30-goal haul as he leads Spurs' chase for a first major trophy in ten years! After facing Palace, Roy Hodgson convinces Pochettino to put Kane on corners like he did at Euro 2016 – and Spurs' trophy dream dies! No Prem team has ever had a st stronger Portuguese flavour than Wolves – eight players in the squad and five more among the manager’s staff. Portuguese backroom culture is crucial to their success! News breaks that the only Nando’s in Wolverhampton is set to close for refurbishment and Wolves lose their hunger!

LEICESTER

Leicester have unearthed a gem in James in more Maddison. No player at the club was involved in his than the five goals Madds scored and assisted call-up! opening eight games – it bagged him an England

Maddison’s form continues and the big boys take notice. Man. City bid £100m and Leicester’s board take the cash!

MA MAN. UNITED

Jose Mourinho’s key to success is having in press the whole footy world against him. He’s moody wants conferences, he loves a good moan and he all wrong! people to doubt him so he can prove them

Mou rediscovers a zest for life and suddenly the Jose grin becomes a household treasure. United win nothing but Jose's smile stays!