A SOUND ARGUMENT
The Missenden Flyer tackles the thorny subject of loud exhausts and comes clean about why most bikers like to make a big noise
‘Loud Pipes Save Lives.’ That’s what the old car window sticker of the 1990s used to say. And to this day I often hear bikers banging on in a pseudo-scientific nasal drone about how they have a loud exhaust so that traffic can hear them coming, pretending that the safety argument is the only reason they like to wake the dead with their slash-cut race can at 6am. Sadly, physics doesn’t support this theory. According to audio boffins, 93% of the sound of an exhaust is transmitted rearward. Now, if your pipe is loud enough, then the 7% that goes slightly forward of your position could help you get noticed, and surely that isn’t a bad thing. Except of course the 93% that tends to go backwards, and hangs in the air like a trail of aural smoke on the breeze, tends to annoy the hell out of most people. But there is an exception to this. If you’re in an urban environment, then the sound emanating backwards gets reflected off buildings, walls, street furniture and so on. Providing you are riding at less than the speed of sound, a good proportion of it ends up echoing its way ahead of you. So, in town; arguably where you need every fibre of self-preservation and attentiveness, not to mention luck, some of your loud pipe’s efforts are getting you noticed ahead of your position. This is great news; I love a fruity pipe as much as the next man. As much as I enjoy the sound of a sportsbike at full chat, I get it that not everyone shares my feelings. Not least on a summer’s Sunday morning when Mrs Mountshaft from Upper Drakesbottom is enjoying a leisurely breakfast in her country garden. One solution is to self-impose a curfew so we only ride during the middle of the day; another would be for us to remove our aftermarket pipes and refit our Euro-compliant near-silent puffers. Or we can all go green and buy ourselves electric bikes. While a decent wedge of the population will be delighted by the electric automotive serenity, the number of inattentive pedestrians getting squished as they step out without looking will doubtless get the safety lobby’s dander up.
But for now I say rhubarb to it. Whether my pipe saves my life or not I’m leaving it on because it sounds cool. And makes me smile…