GHOUL SHIT

Metal Hammer (UK) - - Contents -

We open a spe­cial hor­ror-re­lated Pan­dora’s Box to un­cover Dario Ar­gento box sets, talk­ing Re­gan dolls, caul­dron cof­fee mugs, pop-up Chucky dolls and more.

RE­GAN TALK­ING DOLL

£69.99

To be fair, your mother is prob­a­bly hav­ing a lovely time in Hell, no mat­ter what the ru­mours say. But to stop this fake news spread­ing, you should prob­a­bly get your hands on Re­gan to shut her up for good (and find out who else she has dirt on). HTTP://TINYURL.COM/EXORCIST-DOLL

RABID HEART

£6.99/£13.99

Not con­tent with pen­ning metal lyrics over­flow­ing with can­ni­bals and body parts in var­i­ous, un­nat­u­ral con­fig­u­ra­tions, Bro­ken Hope founder Jeremy Wag­ner has put the ‘gross’ in ‘en­gross­ing’ with this break­neck­paced zombie novel, full of blood, brains and, nat­u­rally, metal ref­er­ences. HTTP://TINYURL.COM/RABID-HEART

VAMPIRA HAND FAN

£4.62

If you’re in need of this glo­ri­ously ghoul­ish wood and pa­per fan, chances are it’s not the heat it­self you need to worry about. But whether in in­flam­ma­tory day­light or a dark­ened cor­ner, whip­ping this out will add fur­ther author­ity to your blood-chill­ing gaze. HTTP://TINYURL.COM/VAMPIRA-FAN

LA­MENT CONFIGURATION FUZZY DICE

£12.82

Noth­ing says ‘I’m a fun guy once you get to know me’ like dice hang­ing from your car mir­ror, and noth­ing screams ‘LOOK HOW MUCH I LOVE HOR­ROR PLEASE DON’T RUN’ with the sound of a thou­sand ag­o­nised ban­shees like these por­tals to Hell from Hell­raiser! HTTP://TINYURL.COM/HELL­RAISER-DICE

PRINCE OF DARK­NESS POSTER

£40

When you and your part­ner set­tle down for a bit of

The Devil’s Work, there’s noth­ing to kill the mood more than a con­cerned and slightly pan­icked pri­est loom­ing over you and star­ing into the mid­dle-dis­tance. Still, it’s bet­ter than when your mum walked in. HTTP://TINYURL.COM/DARK­NESS-POSTER

THE DARK LIGHT

£44.99

Bring Drac­ula’s Cas­tle to your crib with this blood­thirsty wall light. Flick the switch and throw creepy shad­ows, or buy a pair and re­ally amp up the the­atrics. Much more ef­fec­tive at sum­mon­ing up night ter­rors than that other Bat Light, too. HTTP://TINYURL.COM/THE-DARK-LIGHT

CAUL­DRON COF­FEE MUG

£13.70

We’ve all been there. It’s the end of the party, there’s no booze left, but you still want a night­cap. It’s shit mix time! Pour all the drib­bles and ends into your very own caul­dron to stir up with some eye of newt and guar­an­tee that hang­over of a life­time. HTTP://TINYURL.COM/CAUL­DRON-COF­FEE

MICHAEL MYERS MUG

£17.99

The thing about Hal­loween’s Michael Myers is that he doesn’t have any su­per­pow­ers, he’s just dou­ble­hard and can seem­ingly ap­pear out of nowhere… like on the side of your cof­fee mug! Just the con­cept of hot wa­ter will at­tract the mur­der­ous Myers to your morn­ing cuppa.

HTTP://TINYURL.COM/MYERS-MUG

JA­SON MASK RING

£19.25

If you’re a fan of a bit of bling but al­ways wished it was a bit more grue­some, then this solid ti­ta­nium ring of the iconic mask of Fri­day The Thir­teenth’s Ja­son Voorhees is a dream pur­chase for you. HTTP://TINYURL.COM/VOORHEES-RING

KRUEGER SWEATER

£39.99

We al­ways tend to look at the neg­a­tives, don’t we?

OK, so yeah, Freddy Krueger was a child mur­derer who has spent the last 30-plus years ter­ror­is­ing the dreams of teens all over the world… but he wears a cool jumper, doesn’t he? You’d wear that, wouldn’t you? HTTPS://TINYURL.COM/KRUEGER-KNIT

WALK­ING DEAD MONOPOLY

£28.99 Monopoly is about stress, anger and panic, and we’ve all wanted that dick­head hog­ging the blues to catch some form of zomb­i­fy­ing dis­ease, so why not com­bine all these el­e­ments into one glo­ri­ous game of gore? HTTP://TINYURL.COM/ ZOMBIE-MONOPOLY

CHUCKY IN A BOX

£39.50

It’s not like it was when we were kids these days! Back in our day a lit­tle jump from a Jack In The Box was an early giddy thrill. But now? Scare your off­spring half to death as the scarred se­rial killer doll Chucky leaps out at them… bit much in­nit? HTTP://TINYURL.COM/CHUCKY-BOX

PENNYWISE POP! VINYL

£12.99

We’re big fans of the orig­i­nal Pennywise The Clown, as played by Tim Curry, but in last year’s IT re­make Bill Skars­gard re­ally upped the ante. So, this up­dated Pop! Vinyl of Pennywise, com­plete with spi­der legs, is def­i­nitely on our ‘must have’ list. HTTP://TINYURL.COM/PENNYWISE-POP

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