PUT ALESTORM ON YOUR COVER
...plus other bold demands you lovely, lovely people had for Team Hammer this month
WHYOWA
Nine Slipknot covers? Are you serious? How am I supposed to be expected to spank on NINE covers? I did, obviously, because I’m a superfan and I can’t help myself. My wall thanks you, Hammer – my wallet doesn’t though. Pricks.
One Angry Maggot (email)
Hey, we’re not holding a gun to anyone’s head. We just love those new masks so much (no, really!), we thought it was only fair we gave them the chance to shine. Thanks for your support though, you bonkers little legend.
HEADWHINER
People are often chatty about which bands will headline Download down the line, but am I the only one who’s more interested in who’ll do Bloodstock in years to come? Will we see more ‘scene bands’ like Trivium and Parkway Drive step up, or will extreme metal be given a proper chance? I’d love to see Rotting Christ be given a go.
George Patsen (email) So what you’re saying is… #WhyNotRottingChrist? Ah come on, we had to do it. It was an open goal. Allow us. We’re not sure what a ‘scene band’ is, though.
ZERO FOX GIVEN
It is the year of our lord 2019 and whining men are still throwing their toys out of the pram over Babymetal. Can we just accept they’re here to stay and, remember, IF YOU DON’T LIKE THEM NO ONE IS FORCING YOU TO LISTEN TO THEM OR GO TO THEIR CONCERTS GOODNIGHT GOD BLESS AND THANK YOU.
Jess Evans (email)
The day we can stop the internet moaning is the day Rammstein do an acoustic show at Buckingham Palace and actually that sounds like an amazing idea and we’re going to pitch that to Rammstein right now.
RUFC
Just a theory here: the Roadrunner United album from 2005 is a great album to give someone as an introduction into metal as it covers quite a few different styles. Thoughts?
Mark Waite (Facebook)
We back it. And we think it’s long overdue a sequel, don’t you? If Roadrunner aren’t up for it, how about Nuclear Blast United? Metal Blade United? We’d do one but none of us can play shit. That’s why we do this instead, to be honest.
TANKS A LOT
Two months on and I’m still playing with my free tank from your Sabaton issue. Does that make me A) the most dedicated reader ever B) a soldier-in-waiting or C) a massive loser?
Matt Pilsborough (email)
A little from column A, a little from column B… probably quite a lot from column C, to be honest. But as fellow proud losers, we’re right with you.
MO MONEY, MO PROBLEMS
Metallica donated to charity in every city they visited on their last tour. They sell out every show, they’ve put in the hard yards over 35+ years and have the quality to back it up. What do people expect them to do? Play 2,000 capacity venues with tickets at £20 a pop? Good luck trying to get to see them then.
Michael Lee (Facebook)
Fair point. We’d be well up for paying £20 to see Metallica in a 20k-cap venue though. Just saying.
THRASH BANG WALLOP
Thrash wasn’t so much killed in the 90s as it was buried alive by the industry. Thanks to a new wave of thrash the next decade – and the perseverance of Slayer, who never toned down or compromised their style – the old school is now bigger than ever. And the majority of those grunge and nu metal acts… where are they now?
Gerald Albert (Facebook)
To be fair, a good few of them are still headlining arenas, but yeah, thrash had never and will never die. Although we think if you’re insisting Slayer never compromised their style you’ve never listened to Diabolus In Musica.
KORN REBORN
How incredible is it that two decades into their career Korn are still reinventing themselves? I love the sound of the new material, it’s darker than anything they’ve done in years. I’m just saying I’m here for goth Korn, that’s all.
Amy Johansen (Facebook)
Korn do seem to be ageing like a fine wine, don’t they? Although we’re not sure if we need them to go Full Goth quite yet. Save the spoopy piano sections for the next album.
PIECES OF HATE
You’ve done Amon Amarth (Vikings) and Sabaton (soldiers) already this year. Surely it’s time for Alestorm to get their first Metal Hammer cover? They pull big crowds, they have killer songs, they have a giant rubber duck. What more do you need?
Craig Rose (Facebook)
Look, we’ve all had a drink (of rum?), let’s not get carried away with ourselves here.