Please, Sir, I don’t want more
THE BIG RELEASE TWIST 12 ★★✩✩✩
‘PEOPLE don’t really call me Oliver any more – they call me Twist,’ declares our titular hero before warning that ‘if singing, dancing and happy endings is your thing, then you’re watching the wrong version of this story.’ It’s a wildly unwise remark given that of all the many twists on Dickens’ legendary tale, this is one to file under ‘please sir, I’d rather rewatch the musical’.
Rafferty Law, looking spookily similar to dad Jude (minus the roguish charm), takes the lead as Twist, an angel-faced street orphan who sprays his showstopping graffiti artworks on London’s tower blocks. On the run from the police, Twist is scooped up by ‘Dodge’ (Rita Ora, who’s actually jolly good), who brings him under the wing of Fagin (Michael Caine in Get Carter-lite mode), a minor crime lord whose urchin family are never more than set dressing.
Aided by the persuasive charms of Red (Sophie Simnett), a parkour-loving bisexual take on Nancy dressed in crazy Sex And The City-worthy fashion, Fagin co-opts Twist into trying to steal a painting from a posh, mean ‘art connoisseur’ (David Walliams – boooo!) Meantime, a violent, leather-clad lesbian called Sikes (a cringeworthy Lena Headey) lurks, snarling under an evil Claudia Winkleman fringe.
For a Dickens update so desperate to be down wiv da kids, Twist feels bizarrely stuck in the Lock Stock/Trainspotting era, complete with freezeframing the characters as ‘the artist’ or ‘the dodge’ over the credits. Genderflipping aside, it fails to convince you of any modern-day relevance unless as some kind of CBBC-meets-Guy Ritchie intro to a fusty old classic. What ultimately saves this homegrown caper from the Dickens dustbin is that it doesn’t take itself too seriously. An ideal fit for straight-tosmall screen, Twist is definitely more The Hustle than Ocean’s Eleven.
Out Friday on Sky Cinema