IGNORE THAT CRAP OUT ON THE PITCH, BLAME THE BOSS!

ARSENE WENGER must go. Andres Villas-boas must go. Their time is up and that double departure is the only way to rip up the tags of “crisis club” that have been placed on Arsenal and Chelsea.

The fat lady has sung, stripped, had a goodnight sh*t and is sleeping soundly.

Fat wallies with laptops are quoting their sources in the game, so that’s that. Game over – join the dole queue, boys.

London’s calling for two new managers, but why?

I do a little bit of sick in my mouth every time I read these stories. Where do all the dressing rooms that managers lose end up?

Is there a lost dressing room office? Will I trip over one the next time I’m in the Big Smoke?

It’s never the players’ fault, is it?

Yet it’s the players who are cosying up to the scribes to generate these sh*t-stirring stories in the first place.

And it’s the players underperforming on the pitch that has got the pigs sniffing at the trough for another sacking. ow about these millionaires pull their socks up and try a bit harder where they can make a difference – on the pitch.

How about they grow a pair, get stuck in and listen to their manager’s instructions instead of acting like Kevin The Teenager and whingeing on the shoulder of the nearest hack?

The finger pointing at managers in football is tiresome. And the frequency of it is a sure sign that player power has gone too far. If

HWenger left Arsenal tomorrow, there’d be a queue of clubs longer than Whitney Houston’s last line of Bolivian marching powder willing to give “The Professor” a job.

They might give him a bit of money, too. Real money, and not this mysterious pot of gold that apparently remains unspent in some deep, dark corner of the Emirates stadium. As for Wenger’s replacement – Pep Guardiola has laughably been linked to the Arsenal job.

And I’ll have some of what they were smoking when they wrote that!

On to Villa-boas. Roman Abramovich was so convinced of his powers he forked out £13.2million to prise him from Porto.

Now he’s seemingly on the verge of axing his sixth manager. nd all because Villas-boas doesn’t have the power to make John Terry, Frank Lampard and Didier Drogba young again.

If AVB goes, the next man will face exactly the same situation. Perhaps the boys in blue who step onto the Stamford Bridge pitch should stop whispering behind their boss’s back and look in the mirror.

Their egos may tell them otherwise, but they’re not Peter Pan.

Chelsea need fresh new blood on the playing staff, not in the manager’s office. And the same goes for Arsenal.

But hey, let’s ignore all that – that’s not where the show’s at. Get the chopper out, chairman, it’s all the manager’s fault…

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