Midweek Sport - - NEWS -

And it nearly matches the num­ber of “e-phones” sold by business ge­nius Lord Sugar’s firm Am­strad.

Leg­ends in their own box rooms, this year’s rum bunch of tin­pot ty­coons have job ti­tles in­clud­ing “Owner of a Per­sonal Brand­ing Company”, “Fash­ion Re­tailer” and “Di­rec­tor of a Pub Quiz Company”.

In plain English, I’m guess­ing that means: makes badges with your name on; runs a mar­ket stall; stands in your lo­cal ev­ery Tues­day night be­ing a colos­sal

first of never-end­ing elim­i­na­tion rounds be­gan this week­end, with Blonde Elec­tra at the front of the queue to get the bul­let.

That was a tough break for the Ir­ish duo – but the good news is that we are still three weeks from Hal­loween. So if they kept the tags in their cos­tumes, Asda will prob­a­bly take them back.

The other group to go was Over­load Gen­er­a­tion.

They could now merge with Blonde Elec­tra to form a su­per­group called Over­loaded Gen­er­a­tor.

Other high­lights in­cluded one act the face of the reign­ing monarch. Why would any­one con­fuse Si­mon Cow­ell with a queen?

I recorded Sun­day night’s re­sults show, which meant I could fast-for­ward through the ad­verts, the re-caps, the bits where the judges walk in and all of host Der­mot O’Leary’s dra­matic pauses.

After that, I ended up with a rea­son­able en­ter­tain­ing four min­utes of tele­vi­sion. Never mind This show is clearly the Ex­cess Fac­tor.

chuck­ing about fake ban­knotes fea­tur­ing the face of Si­mon Cow­ell. How silly. Real ban­knotes fea­ture

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