PRINCESS KATE’S ‘ROMP WITH RANDY CAROL SINGER’
CHEEKY comic VIZ was at the centre of a Royal storm last night for a Christmas issue showing the Duchess of Cambridge shagging a randy carol singer!
Princess Kate romps with Melvin Gaviscon while Prince William has nipped down the pub with the rest of the Royals.
In the spoof tabloid-style article ,called Wa-Hey In A Manger, shagger Melvin “lifts the lid on his two decades of festive nookie.”
The 63-year-old claims he has romped with some of Hollywood’s biggest celebs including Madonna, Pamela Anderson, Keira Knightley and even America’s new First Lady Melania Trump.
But his biggest conquest apparently came when he knocked on the door of Buckingham Palace and Princess Kate answered the door.
Kate – wearing a “see-through nightie” – decides to repay him for his rendition of We Wish You A Merry Christmas with a sex romp.
Melvin revealed: “Next thing I knew, the see-through nightie had hit the deck – along with top-of-the-range Victoria’s Secret scuds – and the future queen of England was standing stark bollock naked before me.
“Modesty. not to mention the Treasons Act 1534, forbids me from going into too much detail about what happened next, but suffice it to say we painted that sofa fifty shades of royal blue. “And then, once we’d got our breaths back, we did it again. The knowledge that if we were discovered I’d be publicly hung, drawn and quartered only heightened the erotic excitement of our tryst.
“As I was pulling up my trackie bottoms afterwards, I suddenly heard a key in the front door. Let me tell you, I was out the window and high-tailing it across the Buckingham Palace lawn like my arse was on fire!”
The fake report has been lashed by one religious campaign group.
Christian Coalition spokesman Lee Douglas said: “It’s in very bad taste. I don’t think it’s funny at all.”