AGONY IS BROUGHT TO YOU IN ASSOCIATION

A BARMAID at my local has been supplementing her wages by allowing the regulars to grope her 36DD breasts. She charges £10 and some nights she can earn £100. But she has now informed us that from next month the price will double to £20.

We reckon this increase is outrageous and far exceeds the rate of inflation. Do you think she is exploiting her loyal customers?

MY, Cambs

Ashleigh says…

NO. She’s handling her affairs very well. Unless you know of any other barmaids in the area offering a feel for a tenner! Good luck with that! I AM addicted to watching women’s athletics – all those flashing, toned thighs and tight, sexy white shorts and crop tops. I can’t wait for summer when the season starts. I go down my local track and you can see the girls’ fannies sluicing about as they run, jump and throw.

I travel the country to watch as many athletic meets as possible.

Once I nearly got caught wanking opposite the landing area of the women’s high jump.

Is what I’m doing OK?

Ashleigh says…

JY, Cornwall KEEP your dick in your trousers – unless you’re watching it alone in the comfort of your own home on the telly.

Otherwise you will end up being arrested and you won’t get that kind of sport in jail! WHENEVER I see your boobs I jizz on the spot. Is this normal?

Ashleigh says…

I DON’T know. But I’ll take it as a compliment. BT, Preston