STEVE IGNORANT
Crass’ Punch & Judy man in his own words and by his own hand.
He’s the ex-Crass voice who’s now with Slice Of Life. He shares his Self-Portrait, and lays down the law on embarrassment, regrets and his dream pub.
I’d describe myself as… bad haircut, worse attitude, but hanging in there. Vocalist, songwriter, I’ve done lifeboats though I’m too old for it now. Anything community-wise and I’m there. I’m pretty responsible until I have too many lagers, then I tend to give things away. If someone needs it, they can have it. Music changed me by… giving me a sense of identity. When I was growing up I heard Frank Ifield and Frankie Vaughan on the radio. Then I heard 54-46 That‘s My Number by Toots And The Maytals at a friend’s house and it was, I love this! When my sister took me to see West Side Story, the soundtrack blew me away, which got me into Burt Bacharach at an early age, then Bowie, then I got into punk… [but] meeting [current band] Slice Of Life gave me the confidence to actually start singing.
Away from music I… go to the pub, walk the dog, domestic stuff. I dabble in woodcarving and read. At the moment I’ve got The Confidential Agent by Graham Greene – I love his use of punctuation – Rape Of The Fair Country by Alexander Cordell and Saturday Night And Sunday Morning by Alan Sillitoe.
My biggest vices are… er, is drinking and smoking a bit tame? I smoke roll-ups, about half a fag’s worth, about 20 a day.
The last time I was embarrassed was… about four weeks ago. I was saying to Carol [Hodge, Slice Of Life keyboardist] about LGBT Pride in Norwich and how I was going to do Heterosexual Pride. I meant it as a joke but she let me know what an arsehole I sounded. I’m going red just thinking about it. I thanked her for that, but I’ll do something else stupid soon.
My formal qualifications are… an O level in Art, CSE Grade 1 in English Literature and Language and a Grade 3 CSE in Geography. And I got a U in Maths.
The last time I cried was… in Huddersfield three weeks ago. I was on-stage and I didn’t feel right. I walked straight off and I just broke down. I suffer from… I get bouts of depression. I can be under the duvet for three days.
Vinyl, CD or streaming?… vinyl to play and look at and hold. CDs for convenience. I don’t bother with MP3 at all.
My most treasured possession is… Barry Hines’s egg cup. I dedicated my autobiography to him and Alan Sillitoe, and sent it to David Bradley, who played Billy Casper [in Kes]. He put me in touch with [Hines’s] wife Eleanor, who I invited to [2010 Crass revisiting] The Last Supper. She came with her son and gave me [Barry’s] egg cup. I broke down in floods of tears. It’s white, ceramic, with a ’70s rainbow coming out of a cloud and “Barry” written on it. Every year a friend gives me a bottle of sloe gin, and I drink it out of the egg cup. I tried eating an egg out of it once, it didn’t feel right. The best book I’ve read is… [Barry Hines’s] Kes. Got to be.
Is the glass half-full or half-empty?… half-full. Life is too bloody short and I’m fed up with being pessimistic. I’m still fit-ish, the sun is shining, and I don’t give a fuck. Of course,
I do give a fuck, just not about petty things.
My greatest regret is… not going to see Johnny Dankworth at a jazz club when
I had the chance. I think it was raining and I thought, “I’ll go another time”. He died a few weeks later. He did some great soundtracks – The Servant, Gangster No. 1 – and it would have been nice to say thanks.
When we die… people cry. Funerals are dreadful things to sit through. After that, I wouldn’t like to guess. If there is a hell and I go, my penance will be being surrounded by boring loudmouths, listening to them talk and talk, with no beer. Paradise would be going through the double door of a saloon bar, red flock wallpaper, decent beer, you can smoke, everybody you ever wanted to meet is there.
I would like to be remembered as… Steve Ignorant? Quite a decent geezer really, always had time for you. If anyone wants to raise a glass to me now and again, that would be nice.
Steve Ignorant’s Slice Of Life’s Don’t Turn Away is out now on Overground Records.
“My most treasured possession? Barry Hines’s egg cup.” STEVE IGNORANT