Ask Helen
Celebrity agony aunt Helen Lederer gives you her heartfelt advice every week
Do not despair. Give yourself time to adjust to the possibilities of what is out there
My daughter has finally admitted that there might be something wrong with our grandson and has taken him for testing for autism. I have suspected this for some time – he’s 18 months old – but couldn’t say anything. I feel absolutely devastated by the fact that he will never have a normal life. I know I really should pull myself together and be brave for them all, but quite honestly I just want to weep.
We all want the best for our children and their children, so I can completely understand the current sadness you describe.
However, getting tested and an accurate diagnosis can only be good. It will confirm – or not – your suspicions but will also enable early and effective action which is so important. This is such a common situation and so much more is known about autism now, that it should be reassuring to know that
help really is more readily available.
Your role though, as you say, is support. Why not find out all you can about autism?
Start with WWW.AUTISM.ORG.UK but there are many other sites to help you begin this new journey – you could ask for information at your library or health centre as well. The good news is that you can be a great help to your grandson as well as providing massive support for your daughter.
Do not despair – once you have experienced and processed your initial reaction to the new information and given yourself some time to adjust to the possibilities of what is out there, you can start living the best life you can for everyone. You are certainly not alone… a family support group might be a good place to start.