I Tap-Danced My Way Through Cancer
Real Life
I’ve always been a bit of a performer, and spent most of my working life as part of a musical duet with my husband Keith. I’d play the banjo, and he’d be on the bass guitar. I also did a bit of office work to make ends meet – a really varied career.
In 2009 my youngest son Stefan, now 30, became part of a comedy troupe The Midnight Beasts. He became a YouTube star and was soon filling 2,000-seat arenas.
As his career blossomed, my husband became his tour manager and I took over his merchandise. It was busy time – we even had fans sitting outside our house, although most people over the age of 18 wouldn’t have heard of him at the time!
After a while, I realised that I had been completely swallowed up into that world and that I hadn’t played my banjo for ages. It was 2015, I was 65 and it was time to do something for myself.
Like most of us, I’d done a few dance classes when I was younger and even tried a bit of tap dancing when I worked a summer season at the Royal Hippodrome in Eastbourne, aged 16. Sadly tap dancing soon fell out of fashion, and by the time it became popular again, I was married with three young children, a busy career and no time to pick up my dance shoes.
In 2015 when I saw that the nearby adult education college, City Lit, ran tapdancing classes I signed up immediately. This was a way to keep fit, enjoy myself and perhaps eliminate one of my regrets all in one! After a few months I persuaded my sister Susan to join me. We had a fabulous time.
Things were going great until March 2016, I discovered a small lump on my breast while I was reading in bed. It was a real heart-sink moment; you tell yourself it’s nothing, but I think deep down I knew.
Two weeks later, it was confirmed – I had breast cancer. I tried to stay positive, and when I had a lumpectomy a few weeks later, I was convinced I’d get the all-clear.
Sadly it wasn’t to be – doctors told me that they’d found further cancer in the
Concentrating on my steps, my y head had no room for worry
breast and I had to have a mastectomy. A month later, I had reconstruction; they took fat from my stomach to create a new breast.
All the operations took their toll and I needed plenty of rest. Although not at the forefront of my mind, I was glad it was summer and the tap dancing classes had finished until the September.
In the August, I began my chemotherapy. Cancer is a real endurance test, and for me, chemo was probably the worst part. I didn’t want to let it stop me doing the things I love, but in some ways you have to surrender to the process.
However, by the time classes started again in September I’d begun to understand the pattern of chemo; I’d have two or three really rough days after the treatment and after that – though I needed rest – was able to resume some activities.
I began to ask to have my chemo on a Friday, so that by the time my Thursday class came around I’d feel well enough to go. Over the course of the treatment, which went on for five months, I was able to get to 2 out of 3 classes.
Susan’s support was invaluable. She’d keep the other dance pupils up to date – so when my hair fell out after the second round, no one batted an eyelid.
People can be a bit wary around you when you have cancer, but the group were fantastic – even asking to stroke my fuzzy crew cut when my hair started to grow back, buying me little presents like a purple hat and chemo sweets.
Tap dancing became a lifeline – something that made me feel I wasn’t living on Planet Cancer, but was still able to be myself. For that hour
and a half I had to concentrate fully on my steps; my head had no room to worry. I’d always leave the lesson feeling positive.
Even at home, thinking my way through the steps and practising a little kept my mind occupied and reduced stress.
Three years on, I’ve progressed to taking three classes a week! Of course, I still have regular check-ups, but
feel very fit within myself. Yes, I’ve got one boob that’s a bit bigger than the other… but I dress accordingly and get on with life.
Doing something you love while going through treatment is a great help. Tap dancing kept me grounded during cancer. Even on the difficult days, I could focus on my next class and find a way to smile.
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