I’ve found myself after 51 years...

HOW A CLASSIC MID-LIFE CRISIS INSPIRED HER NEW BALD AMBITION

How did you cope with turning 50 last year?

(Laughs) I’m calling it a classic scream for help, a classic mid-life crisis. Like a lot of people locked away for two years during the pandemic, various things occurred.

I lost a lot of my hair through alopecia that was stress-related and that was quite confronting and I bought a sports car, and I separated from my wife for a year, but we are back together again.

I did think of buying a motorbike as well, but my wife firmly said no so I escaped that one. I’ve come through the other side and started to think ‘actually that bit was quite funny’ so that was the start of my new Bald Ambition Show.

How is your hair now?

I’ve been tackling the alopecia for two years now. It’s coming back in tiny tufts, but I think my hair might actually be scared to return because of what I might do to it next.

I got a wig when I had three telly jobs coming up and all the jobs were all outside in gale-force winds. I thought I would have to gaffer tape the wig on my head.

I remember driving the wig home and it sitting like a little dog on the passenger seat.

I had an incredible wig maker though. She made it look just like my hair even down to the grey streak I had put in. (Laughs)

Maybe I could have gone with a big blonde perm, but I think that might have been too startling.

I’m not precious in any way, but I really liked my hair. It’s hard looking in a mirror and not looking like you used to, but otherwise I’m healthy and I’m very grateful for that.

Particularly with the job I do, I can’t hide under the desk. I wanted to step up and deal with it and find the comedy in it all.

ZOE LYONS TELLS MARION MCMULLEN

TOUR

How did you end up delivering vegetables during the pandemic?

A friend of mine was doing deliveries and I went along because I really, really wanted to get out of the house and I wanted to do something.

I had been about to do a new series of my BBC 2 quiz Lightning and everything closed down two days before we were supposed to start filming. Everything stopped.

I remember at one point driving right past the office of the production company in London in a van filled with courgettes in boxes.

Are you now looking forward to touring again?

I really am. There’s nothing like a live audience.

People are struggling now with the cost of living and it means a lot that people have taken the time to come and see you.

I’ve had the opportunity to be in so many lovely things on TV and radio like Just A Minute and Mock The Week. I’m always so grateful and thankful to be part of these institutions and you never know what is going to happen next.

I’m now 51 and it is an interesting, brilliant, time in my life. I’ve stopped trying to please other people and I think I’ve finally found myself after 51 years.

How will you be spending the festive season?

Diving in Mexico with my wife. I love scuba diving and I love a challenge. (Laughs) I’m really a 14-year-old boy trapped in the body of a fiftysomething.

My life is rarely dull, but often quite exhausting. I have a brain that cannot settle and is constantly looking for things.

I ran quite a bit during lockdowns. I kept running further and further and then my brother and I decided to do a 100k ultra marathon from London to Brighton.

To be honest, it didn’t really didn’t end well and there were various mishaps, but it was memorable.

In the back of my mind I was also thinking, ‘This will make a great show’. (Laughs) Nothing is ever wasted.

Anything still on the wish list?

I’d love to be in a big movie. It wouldn’t have to be a big part, but I’d love to be on the inside of something like that.

I’d love to see the mechanics and workings of a big, big movie set.

Whether or not if ever happens

I’ve no idea, but after everything we’ve all gone through over the last few years anything can happen, so I’m just putting it out there.

You are also taking part in the new series of Channel 4’s Celebrity SAS: Who Dares Wins, which was filmed in Vietnam...

I have a brain that cannot settle and is constantly looking for things

I know. It’s insane, but I can’t say anything about it. It’s like SAS order. (Laughs). If I tell you anything about it I’ll have to kill you.

The Bald Ambition Tour takes in 39 dates and starts on February 2. Visit zoelyons.co.uk for details.

Zoe Lyons

Zoe Lyons says it really means a lot that people come out to see her shows