Our pro says...

Queue? What queue? We waltz straight in on a midweek lunchtime to find plenty of tables sitting empty. A waiter tells us queues of an hour are expected at weekends and peak dinner times. We don’t get much other human contact beyond a steer through the easy-to-navigate photo menu and DIY order form, and a note about what we can’t have: namely most of the puddings, including the black sesame buns that I fell for hard at the Michelin-starred Hong Kong branch. Servers, accessorised variously with headsets and hairnets, are there to serve and clear, serve and clear. This place is a machine. *I wasn’t recognised.

Chilled appetisers – a highlight of Jiangnan cuisine – arrive within minutes, swiftly followed by the rest of our order (tip: order in ‘waves’). Thick discs of crunchy pickled cucumber, with a kiss of garlic and chilli, rouse the appetite; while Shanghai-style drunken chicken offers cool slices of gelatinous dark meat, dimpled skin and a crunch of cartilage (I dig this). But we’re here for the xiao long bao, the Taiwanese chain’s signature Shanghainese soup dumplings. The heavy, liquid-filled pouches of umami goodness are very special: the pork and crab version all the better for the rich, iodine tang of the shellfish encased within silky, supple dough.

Having seen the labour-intensive process behind the XLB (each one crimped into 18 precise Fortuny-esque pleats), it’s a surprise to receive unshapely pork wontons. Their dressing of chilli and black vinegar lacks welly. The same charge can be levelled against dan dan noodles, the day’s big disappointment. Where’s that tonguetingling szechuan pepper, that rich porky flavour? These timid things drown in bland sesame sauce. We drink oolong tea, replenished just once.

With dessert (pleasingly vegetal red bean XLB) we stretch the experience out to an hour, during which time the tables next to us are turned once each.

THE BOTTOM LINE:

I rather enjoy the fast pace and functional canteen vibe (the ‘luxe-y’ design doesn’t fool me). Sure, there are better places to eat dumplings – cheaper ones, too – but few this efficient, this energetic. Would I return? Yes. Would I queue? No.

Total bill for two, excluding service: £57