Pick Me Up!

Your dilemmas

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QMy husband criticises the way I dress, my friends, family and even my cooking. My confidence is shattered, and his behaviour feels abusive, but he doesn’t physically hit me, so how can it be? Clara, Nottingham

AAbuse can be mental or physical, both are classed as domestic violence. It sounds like you have been experienci­ng a lot of gaslightin­g which is the most dangerous form of emotional abuse. Over a long period of time, you start to feel a shadow of the person you once were, trying your hardest to please your partner but unfortunat­ely nothing will ever be good enough.

A person who supposedly loves you would not be criticisin­g everything you do, and the people you have in your life. This type of behaviour is classed as coercive control which is now a chargeable offence. People that abuse their victims this way are doing it for control as it makes them feel empowered.

I would suggest seeking therapy to help understand more about this type of behaviour and how you should move forward.

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 ??  ?? Relationsh­ip counsellor Emma Davey is the founder of My Trauma Therapy. She is also the founder of Facebook support group ‘Victims of Narcissist­ic Abuse’ where you can find support. (mytraumath­erapy.co.uk)
Relationsh­ip counsellor Emma Davey is the founder of My Trauma Therapy. She is also the founder of Facebook support group ‘Victims of Narcissist­ic Abuse’ where you can find support. (mytraumath­erapy.co.uk)

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