Time please, for a pint to celebrate end of the bump

So, what on Earth do we do now? Look how long it took us to break the habits of a lifetime and learn not to shake a hand or, God forbid, give someone a hug. Now, about 15 months on, we are told that from next Monday we can undo most of that and celebrate family and friends in the comfort of a warm embrace once more... if we think it is appropriate and safe, of course.

Remember eating indoors? Pubs and restaurants will be allowed to open for indoor dining from next Monday, too.

As with post-lockdowns one and two, it will be table service only so you will not be able to order from the bar. But at least you will be able to see that bar. It is a wonderful and hugely-deserved start for those who have been fortunate to get through the past year.

The not-so-cheery news is that you will also be able to have another household round to yours.

Yes, that means dreaming up some frankly unbelievable excuses about why you cannot possibly entertain, or doing a quick decorating job on all the ‘public’ areas of your home which have taken a lockdown battering in the past year and which you would now be ashamed to show off again.

That, of course, is if you can even remember how to entertain… But this is tongue-incheek nit-picking. The data is looking good, better by the day. The vaccination programme is romping away. The prime minister would appear to have followed his scientists’ advice, agreed a plan (the ‘road map’) and stuck to it.

Yes, we knew last night’s announcement was coming but it is still wonderful news and if you’re wondering how you might cope, at least you have got six days to practise handshakes and hugs in front of the bedroom mirror… and casting aside those ridiculous elbow bumps, hopefully forever.