A lot meant
DIY fixes worth knowing about… and avoiding
Ihave been a PBO reader as well as a writer for a lot of years, during which I have applied the PBO fit-it-out-yourself treatment to several boats on a budget more typical of running an allotment than a yacht or two. There have been some dazzling successes, notably through buying stuff from farm supplies shops rather than chandlers. There have also been some abject failures, and somewhere in the middle some eccentric but in the long run fascinating purchases. Conscience now dictates it is time to pass on some of the lessons of experience, including the failures, and explain why some of them were not really failures at all, while others were. 1. The Dolphin engine. This a light and excellent machine, running on petrol. The Mk1 featured a dynastart, which was both the starter motor and the dynamo that brewed its electricity. It had no gearbox, astern being engaged by stopping the engine and running it the opposite way round after a longish delay. (This is how big-ship diesels work, but big ships use tugs). Entering a busy harbour under Dolphin Mk1 power gave the operator on-the-job training in boat handling and spiritual development. Increasing sophistication (the Mk2 had an actual gearbox) removed some of its more diverting features. 2. Synergy from Reactive Resins was a form of long-lasting copper antifouling that could be applied by rank amateurs without recourse to necromancy. It worked like a charm, scarcely got its head above the parapet and is now, thanks to EU regulations still unrepealed, unobtainable. 3. Stainless Jubilee clips, ebay version. I used these in great profusion until it became apparent that while the clip bit might have been stainless, the screw bit was not. They were, however, very cheap, unless you factored in time spent trying to get them off to replace them with the real thing. At this point you found that the screwy bits were rusted solid and you needed to twist them off with a mole grip but that didn’t work so they needed to be knocked off with a chisel but that didn’t work either so what about a hacksaw, and by now you had knackered the pipe and your knuckles and you needed to get new clips and new pipe but not, never, ever again, from ebay. 4. Bargain pumps. Submersible bilge pumps are brilliant, until they stop working, in which case they will first flatten your battery and then sink your boat. Hand pumps for the boat’s fresh water system are different. They are available from all the best caravan suppliers and last for about two gallons before expiring out of sight of land. Probably better to get something with Whale in its name, or carry enough spare pumps to get you across the Atlantic. 5. Wood treatments. Well, varnish, ideally Epifanes or Le Tonkinois, which if applied correctly, viz 12 coats, sanded between each, looks lovely and lasts a long time. In our climate, however, putting on 12 coats at the rate of one a day can take a couple of years, at which point it may be time to start all over again. This is why some, including me, have moved to stuff loved by some and hated by others called Woodskin – report later. Before applying anything, though, it is important to remove the vile blackish residue of some stuff called Burgess Woodseal, which (doubtless because of my own incompetence) I found non-durable and a horror to remove.
‘In our climate, putting on 12 coats of varnish at the rate of one a day can take a couple of years’
6. Savage Henry (not his real name). This brute volunteered as crew, having mentioned a couple of transatlantics, which turned out to have been in jet aircraft, as a passenger. Pausing only to place his hand bearing compass next to the steering compass he was sick, dropped a winch handle overboard, was sick again and retired to his bunk, which he saturated with a mephitic cologne before being sick again. Rising, he gybed the boat all standing and was sick again. We left him on a quay somewhere. He probably broke that too.
Mainly, though, the real problems have been few, and consist largely of the Jubilee clips, the black residual gunk, and of course Henry. A life of lashups and agricultural alternatives, administered as per the PBO philosophy, can lead to cheerful and economical seafaring. If you do not believe me, look at the Home Fleet, viz. our Drascombe yawl Lucille, our Corribee Surprise, and our heavy ketch Dahlia. Some allotment, eh?