‘Smooth move’

Craig swaps one French floozy for another

Craig Cheetham

I may have a compulsive urge to buy every car I see that looks interesting, but I’m delighted to say I’m not alone, and that the other person I know with the same disorder is 12 years younger than me so is still in the early stages.

Sam Osbon, this is what you have to look forward to… a yard full of cars and an insufferable need for more that you clearly don’t need. So when Sam advertised his Citroën Xantia on a Facebook group frequented by like-minded individuals with the words ‘would consider a swap’, the deal was done in the first email exchange. We’d been here before over a Fiat Multipla, so there was no question of trust. I liked the look of Sam’s Xantia, he liked the look of my 309 and – serendipitously – I was passing his home 150 miles away on my way to a work commitment the following week. The stars were perfectly aligned, as were the Xantia and 309 as Sam and I filled out V5s in the car park behind his flat one drizzly Tuesday morning.

So what have I ended up with? Well, I can’t help but think I got the better deal. It’s a late model Xantia HDI Exclusive, the former bit meaning it has the later engine originally developed for the Peugeot 406, refined and capable of 55mpg. The latter part means it’s a posh one. ‘Exclusive’ models got leather, heated seats, air con and a CD changer – 20 years on, all still work. Then there’s that legendary Citroën ride – it’s as good as I remember from my last XM and eats speed bumps for breakfast. It’s not perfect, of course. I wasn’t expecting it to be, and it has a bit of rust inside one door shut, a dent in one door, some bumper scuffs and a slightly irritating wheel imbalance between 65-70mph, which makes motorways a bit wobbly, so that’s job number one on the list. The tyres are all nearly-new Uniroyals, so I’m hoping they just need balancing.