‘We only have one life – I wanted to make mine count’

After experiencing several years of loss and sadness, Bev Shaw, 52, from Harrogate, Yorkshire, decided to embark upon a life-changing adventure.

‘Standing on the mountain path, I was tired and filthy. I’d worn the same clothes for two or three days at a time, slept on the floors of monasteries and washed from a cow trough in the open air. And yet, for the first time in a long time, I felt free.

Last March, I ventured to Burma for the trip of a lifetime. For 11 days, I trekked through stunning scenery for up to 15 miles a day with 12 strangers. Although I’d travelled before, and worked on cruiseliners in my youth, this was something totally out of my comfort zone. But deep down, I knew I had to do it to signal the start of a new chapter.

In 2011, my husband, Matthew, took his own life. We’d been married for 18 years, and it was sudden and unexpected. The whole family was bereft. Our two children were shocked and devastated. I tried to stay strong for them and retain some sense of normality. But 2015 brought yet more loss when my dad died suddenly of a stroke, followed by a close friend just six weeks later.

LIFE-CHANGING JOURNEY

Struggling to cope with the grief, I left my job as office manager at a secondary school and sold our family home to move to a more central location in Harrogate, away from the memories. But my uncertain future still loomed large. I needed to reassess my life.

Around that time, an advert for a charity trek in Burma with a travel company called Discover Adventure popped up on my Facebook page.

The trip appealed to my spiritual side – the idea of staying in monasteries brought a sense of peace I’d craved for so long. I liked the idea of doing something positive, raising money for a good cause and coming to terms with my own grief by helping others. We only have one life – I wanted mine to count.

I decided to do the trek in aid of Voluntary Service Overseas (VSO), an organisation that arranges for volunteers to help fight poverty in developing countries. With no experience of serious walking, I trained hard – spending hours in the gym and cold weekends in the Lake District. Trekking through 6ft of snow as part of my training, I thought of Matthew, imagining how funny he would have found the whole thing.

For years, he’d tried to persuade me to do outdoor pursuits. I’d always told him I didn’t “do” wind and rain, let alone stand on a mountain with no make-up on and my hair all over the place!

Once I reached Burma, it was even more beautiful than I imagined. There was a real feeling of peace as we trekked through spectacular scenery. It was a gruelling 11 days, and I pushed my body to its limit. And yet, everyone in our group had a story of their own, and I felt like they understood me. I could be totally honest, without fear of being judged, and I learned that it’s okay to have a bad day – in fact, it’s normal. Crossing the finish line together felt so uplifting, and I’ve carried those friendships with me. What’s more, I was thrilled when I managed to raise more than £1,500.

TURNING POINT

The trip was a turning point in my life, and I’ve since embraced a new mindset. I’m now working as a receptionist at the gym where I trained for the trek, and have learned to look forward, focus on the good things and approach life in a more positive way. Of course, there are still ups and downs – perhaps there always will be – but I now understand, more than ever, that life is a journey, not a destination.’

• For more on Discover Adventure, visit discoveradventure.com