Mindfulness. Yes it can work for you! A simple guide to the therapy
SIX WAYS MINDFULNESS CAN HELP YOU TODAY
‘Focusing on breathing calms us down so we can think more clearly’
We’ve all heard of it, so why are we still not into this oh-so-good-for-us therapy? Too spiritual? Too tricky? Trust us, it’s easier than it sounds What is mindfulness?
It’s all about the awareness that comes from paying attention to the present moment without judging, overreacting or being overwhelmed by it. HOW DO WE DO THAT? ‘By focusing our attention on something that anchors us in the moment – our breath, sounds or sensations in the body,’ says mindfulness teacher Amy Malloy.
When we act with full awareness, we’re more likely to reduce stress, increase focus and achieve goals. WHAT’S HOLDING US BACK? ‘Often, it’s the talk of journeys and other meditation language,’ says Amy. ‘Mindfulness is simply doing small, regular exercises to build up the “muscles” in the brain, which have been shown to encourage a calmer way of experiencing life. No different to Pilates, really.’
How do we get into it? Start simple – do it often is the only mantra you’ll need, but what’s an easy way for getting into mindfulness? Read on to discover Amy’s stop/breathe/watch technique for helping with anxiety – it’s the perfect starting point. ‘Whenever we do this technique it’s very difficult to think about anything else. The length of time we can focus will grow with practice,’ says Amy.
1 EASE YOUR ANXIETY
‘Anxiety comes from being in the fight or flight mode that our brains develop to get us out of danger quickly,’ says Amy. ‘But our brain doesn’t distinguish between a physical or emotional danger, so in our busy modern lives we can end up in a heightened state of stress.’
Any good news? Yes! ‘The simple act of focusing on our breathing for a few moments allows us to step out of autopilot thinking habits and activates our parasympathetic nervous system, automatically calming us down so we can think more clearly,’ says Amy. TRY THIS… Stop. Breathe. Watch Find yourself a comfy spot on the floor.
Stop Gently close your eyes. Notice the weight of your body against the floor. Observe any sounds around you.
Breathe Focus on your breath as it flows in and out. Notice how every breath is different. Where do you feel each one? Is it cool or warm? Continue for 10 breaths, counting each of them.
Watch Notice how your thoughts come and go. Let them do so without following them. Keep a gentle focus on your breath. If your mind wanders, kindly bring it back.
TIP If you lose track of counting, simply start at one again until you feel calmer.
Amy Malloy is a mindfulness teacher and runs courses for a calmer, more resilient mind. Visit nomoreshoulds.com
2 CALM DOWN ‘MRS ANGRY’
Have you noticed that you’re feeling angrier these days? Try this ‘If you can name it, you can tame it’ exercise from psychotherapist Dr Patrizia Collard.
Find a peaceful place; sit comfortably. Wrap up in a blanket; keep warm.
Feel your feet firmly rooted on the ground, your buttocks and lower back supporting you, hands resting in your lap.
Notice your breath. Talk to your anger, saying something such as,
‘Give me your all. I’m not going to react or do what I’ve done in the past.’
Keep focusing on your breathing and ‘dancing’ with your anger.
Remember, anger will pass. Finish when you feel that the right moment has arrived.
Dr Patrizia Collard is a senior lecturer at the University of East London, mindfulness trainer (stressminus.co.uk) and author of The Little Book Of Mindfulness (Octopus)
3 MANAGE YOUR MENOPAUSE
More good news… a recent study by the Mayo Clinic indicates that mindfulness may help us with the emotional symptoms of menopause – anxiety, irritability, depression. Result! Should we try it? ‘Absolutely,’ says Dr Patrizia Collard. ‘Start by accepting that, temporarily, your biochemistry is all upside down. Don’t avoid things, as every time you avoid a situation, it’s harder to handle next time.’ TRY THIS… The Three-step Breathing Practice Find somewhere to sit and go for it. 1 AWARENESS What am I thinking, feeling or sensing in my body?
2 BREATHING Naturally breathe in and out 10 times to settle yourself.
3 GROUNDING With feet fully on the ground, visualise a symbol of strength, such as a tree, mountain or calm sea. Practise this three times a day or use it whenever the going gets rough.
4 GET BETTER SLEEP
If better sleep is your aim, mindfulness can be your new BBF (bedtime best friend). Mindfulness teacher Anna Black suggests this breathing technique to help you if you wake in the night. l Become aware of your body. Notice where it makes contact with the bed and how that feels. Soft? Hard?
l Take a deep breath in and let it out suddenly (if you make a noise as you exhale, that’s okay). Do this two or three times, noticing how the body softens and lets go as you breathe out.
l Then, begin tuning into the outbreath. Notice how the body relaxes and softens. Be curious about which parts of the body feel loose. Just let go.
l You may notice a feeling of ‘holding
on’ or tension in a particular part of the body, perhaps the face or the torso. Simply acknowledge that the tension is there. You may experience a letting go, but there’s no need to force anything.
l If your mind wanders, bring it back. Anna Black is a mindfulness teacher and author of many mindfulness books. Find more sleep techniques in her book Mindfulness And Sleep (Cico Books)
‘Mindfulness may help with emotional symptoms of the menopause’
5 CLEAR YOUR HEAD
Nothing beats walking for clearing the cobwebs, but you can turn it into therapy with the added bonus of mindfulness. ‘Mindful walking provides more for the mind to connect to,’ says mindfulness expert Douglas Baker. ‘We become clear and attentive. Your busy mind fades into the background.’ TRY THIS… Focus on contact with the ground.
Find a place to stand where you can close your eyes for a minute or two. Or look at a space on the floor about 10 feet in front of you.
Investigate. Where are sensations strongest in your body? Probably the bottom of your feet. Take 30 seconds to notice what you feel there. Tingling? Pressure? Warmth? Simply take in your impressions. Mindfulness has begun.
Start with a single step. Slowly begin to lift one foot – as if it’s been glued to the floor and you must gradually peel it off. Observe the sensations. Notice the feeling of lifting your foot. Do it slowly. Think of astronauts walking on the moon.
Observe the feeling of your foot moving through space, and then, contact! Think about those sensations as your foot comes back to terra firma.
Congratulate yourself. You’ve just taken your first mindful walk.
Try different walking speeds. Walk from a normal pace to a slow pace, then very slow, and assess which speed rate helps you stay most focused. ‘This is good for getting to know how mindfulness works for you in walking,’ says Douglas.
Douglas Baker is a US mindfulness teacher (cambridgemindbody.com) and author of 5-Minute Mindfulness: Walking (Fair Winds Press)
6 KILL THE CRAVINGS
YOU EAT MINDLESSLY You know the score, you eat one crisp, then suddenly the whole bag has gone! ‘Turn up the notch on awareness,’ says Dr Susan Albers. ‘It’s the antidote to mindless eating.’
Sit – it helps you to be more in control of your focus. Shut off your devices to avoid zoning out as you munch.
Slow down. Try chewing slowly instead of shovelling it in.
Savour each bite. We often grab the next before finishing the first.
Smile before the next bite. This creates a brief pause, so you can decide if you want more or not.
YOU EAT GUILTILY mostly when no one is around (and it’s probably chocolate!) Don’t try to skip it, just be more mindful so you’re in control. Try Susan’s smart tips:
Slow down. Buy wrapped chocs. Studies show that by unwrapping and making eating chocolate a ritual, it’s more enjoyable.
Sit down. One study found that people eat five times more chocolate while walking.
Sniff a scent. It helps to reduce a chocolate craving. Light a fresh-scented candle or buy an air freshener!
Put it away (not within arm’s reach). According to the ‘proximity effect’ we often eat chocolate because it’s in reach. Remind yourself that food is not a reward. Because if you reward yourself with food, you’re likely to punish yourself with it, too. What you deserve is to relax.
Dr Susan Albers is a clinical psychologist and founder of eatingmindfully.com. Check out her books – Eating Mindfully (New Harbinger) is our top pick
‘With mindful walking, we become clear and attentive’