‘A cuddle with my dog Buster is an ice-breaker’
Former youth worker Carly, from Nuneaton in Warwickshire, has been a foster carer for eight months
‘I was lucky to have a lovely childhood but, as a probation officer and youth worker, I’ve seen others who’ve had a very different upbringing. So last year, I decided to become a foster carer. I was 40, single and in my own two-bed home. I didn’t think about the potential downsides or even dangers – I just felt certain that it was what I wanted to do.
I applied to Barnardo’s and it took about three months to be assessed. A social worker probed into every area of my life, even my ex-boyfriend, but I understood they had be thorough. The charity suggested I might suit short-term emergency work, as I had experience of young people in crisis.
My first foster child, a 15-year-old boy, came to stay in August last year. I was nervous but it was a great first experience. We got on well, and he would get up early to fit into my routine. My friends, who are instructors, taught him indoor climbing, while my parents had us round for dinner. It was great to see him happy. The difficulty was saying goodbye after a month. I know he wanted to stay longer, so it was hard. We were both emotional.
Since then, I’ve had lots of children come and go. My role is to provide short-term placements while they are being matched with a more permanent home. They normally stay for four or five weeks and sadly none of them unpack their things, knowing they’ll be moving on soon. Nevertheless, my Staffordshire bull terrier, Buster, is a big ice-breaker. Few can resist a cuddle with him.
The best way to earn their trust is to do things with them that they enjoy. One 15-year-old girl, who had mental health issues, enjoyed craft, so we chatted as we painted mugs. We’d cook pancakes together and she’d talk about her past. Others are more guarded and I find myself treading on eggshells, which can be quite draining.
I love making a real difference to the lives of young people and I love that I’m doing something I’m passionate about. It doesn’t feel like work.’
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