Rework your to-do and not-to-do list

IF YOU ARE EXHAUSTED, saying no and meaning it is more important than ever. But it can be difficult to let go of the feeling that you need to do everything, especially if you are stressed. Here is an exercise I use when I recognise that I am acting this way. Add an extra column to your to-do list – the ‘not-to-do’ column. Review items on your to-list and identify which tasks you choose not to do today. Move them to the ‘not-to-do’ column.

Is this activity essential to achieving my big goals for today?

Who else could do this?

What is the worst that could happen if I strike this off my list for today?

BY TAKING A more critical view of your to-do list, you consciously manage your time and energy. Items my clients have moved to their ‘not-to-do’ list include: Doing my son’s homework; attending an extra yoga class; sending a reminder to my PA to make sure she schedules a meeting; rechecking a report so it’s ‘perfect’.

While many of these activities can feel important, none are essential to your daily goals and can be moved.

We have made it through the past year, but we are not sure how much longer the pandemic will last. We need to find a way to support our families, teams, communities and ourselves for the duration.

Start now. Grab a pen and jot down your successes, then make a plan to celebrate them, go for a walk or listen to your favourite song as you consciously manage your energy and fill up your tank for the months to come.

Palena Neale is the founder of unabridged, a leadership coaching and mentoring practice that helps women access their power and potential for greater personal, professional and social impact. unabridgedleadership.com; @Palenaneale

“I find it hard to ask for help because I am empathising too much with others. There are benefits to empathy, but it can deplete your resources and lead to burno ut. What you want is sustainable empathy