Perils of automated ticket lines.

Ray Clark sent us an audio file which he thought we might find “amusing… or concerning”. And we certainly did!

Ray had a breakfast show at the time on BBC Essex, and the file is of a recording he made for his show from the Train Tracker system.

“It really did happen this way,” he assures us. “I don’t know if Train Tracker is still available, but if it is then perhaps you’d like to try it yourself.

“The station in question is Althorne in Essex - pronounced ALL - THORNE, and not ( as the recorded on- board announcements of the last two operators, including Greater Anglia) suggest… AL / THORNE.”

Here’s the transcript: Good morning and welcome to Train Tracker. Using this service, you can get timetables and estimated times for National Rail services between any UK stations. This service responds to your voice, just say what you want, when you know. Please just answer one question at a time. OK, let’s get started, where are you travelling from? Althorne. OK then, I’ll look for departures from Langwith Whaley Thorns, Derbyshire. And where are you travelling to? No, Althorne. Thanks. I’ll look for journeys from Langwith Whaley Thorns to Mill Hill Broadway, Middlesex. What day are you travelling? No, you’ve got the station wrong. Althorne. Right. Is that Thursday 17th April? Or Thursday 24th April…? No, Althorne, Althorne. Would you like a return journey? Return journey. Please just say yes or no. Can I get you return details? Yes. Ok then. Mill Hill Broadway to… (continued) No… …Langwith Whaley Thorns (continued) No, No…Althorne. Sorry? I want to go to Althorne. It might be better if you use your keypad. Remember, if you’d like to go back to using speak just press the hash key at any time. I’d like to speak to a person. For departures on Thursday the 17th… (continued) Can I speak to a person? (talking over automated voice). …April. Press 1, if not press 2 (continued) I just want to go to Althorne, I want to go to Althorne, Essex! I’d like to go to Althorne please (still talking over automated voice). Sorry I missed that. I’d like to go to Althorne (laughing). For departures on Thursday the 17th April, press… (continued) Just let me to go Althorne, Althorne. I want to go to Althorne! (talking over automated voice, laughing). …1, if not press 2 (continued). I’m sorry I not sure what you would like to do here? I could connect you to one of our advisors.