Embrace Your Memory Mistakes

Faulty recollections can be extremely revealing, says our memory expert, Jonathan Hancock

The human memory is phenomenally strong. It also has a habit of getting things badly wrong.

Just last week, for example, my wife and I were discussing how we’d chosen our youngest son’s name.

I had a vivid memory of us writing out a list of possible names, but stopping after just a few because we’d spotted one we both loved.

My wife disagreed. In her memory, we’d had a much longer list, and gone back and chosen one from the middle of the list.

So we dug out the piece of paper we’d used—and found that we’d actually done something completely different to choose Nate’s name.

Memory mistakes happen on a larger scale, too. The “Mandela Effect” is when lots of people have confident recollections that turn out to be wrong. It was named by researchers who were discussing their strong memories of Nelson Mandela’s death in prison—when he actually lived for 23 years after his release.

There are plenty of other examples of this phenomenon. If you’re sure that you remember seeing the

Monopoly Man wearing a monocle, for instance, or hearing a wicked queen say “Mirror, mirror on the wall,” you’ve experienced it yourself (he doesn’t, and she says, “Magic mirror on the wall” instead).

So what’s going on? Well, for starters, memory often works by association, and similar bits of information can overlap in our brains. We’re also good at “filling in the blanks” with details that are logical but untrue. What’s more, whenever we rehearse a memory, we make it stronger—including any bits that were wrong.

But there’s plenty of good news here, too.

Everyone misremembers. We shouldn’t be too hard on ourselves when we make mistakes.

The mental associations that sometimes lead to errors can also help us to find elusive information. If you’re struggling with someone’s name, try thinking of things you associate with them, and see if your brain gets the nudge it needs. Discussing your memories is great mental exercise. It highlights strengths and weaknesses, and lets you learn tips from others. Comparing memories often builds a much more accurate picture. That was certainly true for my wife and me.

Make sure to remember that remembering is a creative process: mind-blowingly powerful, and also prone to mistakes.

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